Why can't Helen Keller read? Because she is dead.

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What did the previously pregnant teen flush down the toilet? Her beloved pet goldfish who recently died. She had already given birth to a healthy baby the previous year.

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Why was the little boy crying? Because his older brother was forcing him to pee on an electrical socket.

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Why is my girlfriend pregnant? We wanted an abortion

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I feel like making a good joke.But i cant. YN

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What's the difference between oreos and your opinion? I asked for your opinion.

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A man spoke in a high-pitched voice. Another man said "Are you gay" He responded, "Why, yes"

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What happened to the fat japanese guy? His house was destroyed by the earthquake.

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What is x + 12 That is impossible because you can't add letters

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What did the hobo get for Christmas? Nothing

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Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling.

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What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. Lions do not have the ability to speak. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

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What's worse than Patrick in a blender. Uuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, idk.

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Knock-Knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Why are u crying?

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What do you call a black man on a bike? Environmentally friendly.

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Your Mother

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What is black and has no education A tire.

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why does paul mccartney not wear shoes? cause a nigga stole it

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Why was the woman in the kitchen? She came in to give her husband, who was washing the dishes, a kiss before she went to bed early so she could be well rested and get up on time to make the 45 minute commute to the hospital where she worked as a neurosurgeon the next morning.

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How do you confuse a blonde? To get to the other side

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck would chuck wood? I don't know. The woodchuck won't chuck wood.

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You can teach a man to fish but you cant teach a fish to man

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In Soviet Russia, man doesn't walk to the bar. The bar walks to the man!

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WHATS THE BEST AVENUE TIN SHACK AVENUE

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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