Yo momma so ugly just after she was born, her mother said, "What a treasure!" and her father said, "Yea, let's go bury it!"

how many indians does it take to screw in a light bulb? one if it can reach 2 if it's high.One to screw in the bulb the other to hold the ladder.

A man walked into a bar. What did he say? Ouch.

Why did the man not get home to his loving family? He blew up.

i was molested.

A Woman out of the kitchen

Why didn't Helen Keller have headphones? Because they weren't invented

What do you call a dinosaur when it gets out of a pool? Wet.

What did the grass say to the human "Hey" The human then screams and runs to safety

What's worse than women's rights? Actually, not much, because women throughout history suffered for too long the hardships of over dominant male figures and deserve the freedoms they have achieved today.

What do you get when you cross Chuck Norris with a Cheetah? A yellow Chuck Norris with black spots.

A: Knock knock. B: Who's there? A: Banana! B: Not you again..(slams door)

A blonde goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor, doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains!" "That is a worrying symptom," says the doctor, who immediately recommends the woman for a thorough psychiatric assessment.

What's 6 inches long, held in your hand, and has a round tip? A pencil you pervert.

Jesus Christ walks into a bar and the bartender says "Holy crap it's Jesus!" and everyone quickly updates their Facebooks.

Why did the old woman put roller skates on her rocking chair? She had dementia.

Kid 1: "Want a Hurts Doughnut?" Kid 2: "Umm... sure." Kid 1 opens up a box of freshly baked Hurts doughnut from Hurts Bakery and gives one to kid 2

WOMENS RIGHTS

The NBA lockout

What did the idiot call his pet zebra? Charlie. The fact that the man is an idiot is irrelevant.

What has 4 legs and doesn't bark? A dead dog.

What's the difference between a rabbit and a plum? They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

what did luke say to darth vader? Can i borrow ur car please.

Why was the thirteen year old raped by an online predator? Because he made very poor choices on giving out his personal information.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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