Why did the fat man fall faster than the skinny man? He didn't. Masses does not affect the speed of falling objects. Everything with mass and volume falls with an acceleration of 9.81m/s^2 on Earth. Therefore the greater mass of the heavier man did not affect his falling speed. Both men fell at the same speed.

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Why did Benjamin Franklin go to the movies? Dim message, sapi message=InputBox("Find Out","Why did Benjamin Franklin Go To the Movies?") Set sapi=CreateObject("sapi.spvoice") sapi.Speak message

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a man walks into a bar he is an alcohol and it's ruining his family

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How many women are in the world? a little over 3.2 billion because statistics show that there are roughly 51-52% females in the whole population of humans

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There was an old lady from Ealing Who had a peculiar feeling She lay on her back Opened her crack And pissed all over the ceiling The old lady then lay in her own waste for over two weeks due to neglect by uncaring nursing home staff. Six months later, a hidden camera documentary on underperforming care homes exposed the abuse and neglect and the old lady went to live with her son and his family. In the early hours of May 14th 2011, the whole family were killed in a house fire that gutted the home and saw fires spread to neighbouring houses. Firefighters say the blaze originated in the spare room and was caused by exposed wiring on an electrical blanket. Forensic experts said that the repeated urination on the blanket would likely corrode the wiring due to the acidic content of urine.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the middle of the oceon? Dead in the water.

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A man walked into a bar. What did he say? Ouch.

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Your mother is so fat.... I am happy to see her join our exercise group.

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Susie is 14 & she never listens to her mom, why is that? She's deaf.

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? -I don't have a ferrari in my garage.

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A blind man walks into a bar Backs up, and walks around it.

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What kind of animal eats and pisses on everything? Your mother. -Avery Vartanian

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Religion

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What did the little crippled boy get for his birthday? He's an orphan so he doesn't know his birthday.

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Women's rights.

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Why Did the baby cross the street? He was stapled to the chicken's back

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Roses are red Violets are red Trees are red Shrubs are red HOLY SHIT! MY YARD IS ON FIRE!

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Three nuns walk into a bar. They realize they are in a place they don't want to be, so they leave, casting furtive glances around, fearing that someone from their congregation will see them and think they went in to drink.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Your landlord. I'm here to collect rent

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What did the man want a car for his birthday? 7.

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Whats worse than contracting H.I.V.? nothing

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

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What did the dog say to the cat? I have no idea. I wasn't there.

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scottishman walk into a gay bar. And why shoudn't they.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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