What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? 1. Discovering your "girlfriend" is a man 2. The Holocaust 3. Being Raped 4. Being Raped by a Giant Scorpion-Panda Hybrid 5. Being Raped by a Giant Scorpion-Panda Hybrid who doesn't wear protection.

A bear walks into a bar. The building is evacuated swiftly but several people are killed

Two muffins are in an oven. One says "It's getting hot in here". The other one starts to reply but then it's internal organs burst from the heat.

A guy walks into a bar, he has a few drinks than leaves.

A Priest, a Rabbi, and Santa Claus are on a plane. This is impossible because Santa Claus does not exist.

How many jews can get in a Volvo? 5.

what is long,hard and holds semen,a submarine , i spelled seamen wrong

why did the chicken cross the road ??? why would you care??

knock! knock! who's there? mom mom who? your mom... your girlfriend just died in a car accident while carrying you baby...

what did the atheist get for Christmas? Nothing. If he was being truly honest to his beliefs, he wouldn't partake in a christian holiday.

Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin says its getting hot in here the other muffin say holy shit a talking muffin.

pedophile

What do you call a black person who drives a plane? A pilot.

What's green and has wheels? A cucumber with wheels.

Why was the boy sad? His friend stabbed him with a fork. Also, his mother died. Also, his dad raped him Also, he has a chode. And it really sucks when you have a chode.

Why did Sally fall of the Swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not Sally

Why was the globe sad? Because it was cut in half.

Why are atheists stupid? Actually, statistically, they are more intelligent than believers.

what's funnier than 1 Mecican? 2 Mexicans

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because my first shot missed.

A guy walks into a bar and says, "Ouch!"

An English man a Scotts man and an Irish man buy a helicopter between them,they go to pick it up after paying for it and realise that non of them can fly it. so they get a refund and go to the pub.

What is the difference between obama and a hobo. NOTHING

How many dead babies can you fit in a trash can? 12- 18 (depending on size) I know this because i use to work at a abortion clinic

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...