What's sadder than a dead baby? Any dead adult, considering how much more they've contributed to society.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Incorrect. Violets are violet. DERP!

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

Why didn't the Hispanic die in the bus explosion? Because he was at home playing with his children when it happened.

Do you know what's sad about 4 black men driving off a cliff in a convertible? They were my friends.

There was a Indain and cowboy hunting together. the Indian put his ear down to the gound and said "buffulo come". The cowboy said he didnt see anything when the Indian said, "its Sticky!!!

What is my cats favorite college? Harvard

How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb. One

knock knock Who's there? Me Me who? Me Doa Kong Oh, Hi! Come on in.

What's the similarities between a spoon and a duck. Both are not a lamp

Knock knock Who's there? Fuk Fuk who?

The man was so nice It's too bad he couldn't hear the bus coming.

whats the difference between a door knob? a milk carton, because people have legs so they can walk !!!!!

There was a farmer had a dog and Bingo was his name-oh But the farmer killed and ate him, because Bingo licked himself inappropriately

Why wasn't the tractor moving? Because the farmer was killed in a drive-by shooting.

Husband: Take the f out of way. Wife: There's no f in way! Husband: You just swore

A girlfriend told her boyfriend it soaked all the way through. She screwed up their art project.

-Knock Knock - Who's there? - Child Protective Services, we have multiple reports of you abusing several of your children...

How many shots do you have to take to start feeling light-headed? Ask JFK.

whats worse then being a black kid with out a father? is not that bad it happens all the time

A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

How many pieces of toast can you eat in 1 year? well, it depends on how many pieces you eat in one day, does it count snacks, or full meals of just toast, can you eat even when your not hungary, if you throw up does it still count? If it is 1 piece a day, it would be 365.

A man goes to his doctor and says, "Help me, my wife thinks she's a chicken." The doctor recommends a nearby psychiatrist to analyze the wife's mental instability, and inevitably she is housed in an insane asylum. The husband commits suicide.

what's the difference between 7 and 2? 5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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