Why was the man shot in the head twice? He wasn't because he died after the first and it is nearly impossible to survive a gunshot to the head.

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what did the man say when he was reading a book? nothing, if u assume the situation when hes reading to himself.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Jewish people!

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How much hard work does it take to become a man? To get to the other side!

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Why did Timmy fall down the stairs Because he is blind and I pushed him

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Jim has five apples. He gives two apples to Joe. What is left? Fruit

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Why did the constipated man go to the bathroom? To intentionally throw up; he has an eating disorder.

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Boy: what to hear a joke? girl: sure. Boy: woman rights.

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A man walks into a bar carrying a piece of asphalt under his arm. The bartender says, "We don't serve construction workers here."

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What do you call a jewish womans boobs? JUBES!

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Knock knock *open*

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Why wasn't Hellen Keller a good driver? She didnt get her driver license...

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Daddy drinks, Because you cry.

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What's the difference between a black male and a white female? There are many differences but all of which are wrong to make a joke about.

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Koalas mum is a slut

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Why did the boy drop his ice-cream? He was shot in the back, knifed in the face, kicked in the groin, poo'd on by an alpaka, had frogs stapled to his face, his hair burnt off, pushed off a cliff, eaten by a scorpian, lost his arms legs and eyeballs, squashed by a hippo, ran over by a buss, truck and cement mixer, had cement poured on his frogs (that were stapled to his face), became morbidly obese, was raped by a chicken, was served as sauce at an italian resturant, was done by his mother's father's grandson, broke both of his detatched legs, crashed his car, went into a time machine and was crushed by a stegosaurous, had a lemon squesed in his detatched eyes, got high on cokeawana, was crushed to death by a garbage disposer and was rejected by the hobo at the shelter? no, actually, he tripped

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How many kids with ADHD does it take to fix a lightbulb? Lets go ride bikes.

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A white man, hispanic man, and a black man walk into a bar together. They order cokes.

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What did Valerie get for her birthday? Nothing. Because no one loves her

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Waiter, there is a hydrogen conducting carbon nanotube in my soup. That is part of the special, sir.

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one day i went on a swing, somone pushed me and i fell broke my leg,cracked three ribs, cut my lip, fractured my toe and died of internal bleeding to my brain.

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Girl you must be Jamaican...because you're black and annoying.

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the seat next to you? A: Whatever his name happens to be.

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What do you call a dear with no eyes? no eyed dear what do you call a dear with no head? dead!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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