Why did the little girl fall off the swing set? She had no arms.

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What did the small baby faucet say to the daddy faucet? Nothing, they are inanimate objects and cannot talk.

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Whats 9+10? 19

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Why does Jonny have a phobia birds? Because he has one glued to his face.

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A blonde walks into a salon and says "I would like to get my golden locks trimmed." The haircutter replies "surely, just sit yourself down in that chair over there and I'll be with you momentarily." The blonde walks to the chair and sits down. When the haircutter comes over he asks her, "would you please remove your headset, I can't cut your hair while they're on." She laughs at her forgetfulness and removes them obligingly.

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The pope and three young boys get into a cab. The pope tells the driver to take the boys home.

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Knock knock Who's there? A friend. But I don't have any friends.

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What's the difference between black people and white people? Their skin color.

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What is green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

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Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin says its getting hot in here the other muffin say holy shit a talking muffin.

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What black and blue and red all over? My mom after my dad comes back from the bar.

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What's green and has wheels? A cucumber with wheels.

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Why? Because racecar.

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What do you call a black person who drives a plane? A pilot.

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What is white, and hurts when it falls from a tree? -tom

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Why did the chicken cross the road? know on knows as he can't talk

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Your momma's so ugly she adopted you because she had a problem attracting men.

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You walk in to your room. 7 chickens on your bed.

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The big problem with politicians is they're always lying but fortunately there's always a moment when it's not a problem anymore. When they do it down in their tombs.

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Why did the chess grandmaster lose his mind? Because he died of old age.

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A quadrapeldgic walks no where

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A guy walks into a bar, he has a few drinks than leaves.

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What did the phone say to the telephone? I can't connect with you.

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Q: What did the mime say to the crowd gathered at the crime scene? A:

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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