roses are red violets are blue you look like a monkey lets take you to the zoo if by chance you try to escape ill take my fist and smash your little monkey face! btw i made this up if you use it ill kick your nuts!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +114

Q:What's the difference between a pinata and a baby? A: One I hang from a tree and beat to death and the other one is a pinata..

thumb_up thumb_down +66

Women's Rights

thumb_up thumb_down +48

Q. Did you hear about the kid napping? A. Yeah, he woke up and was grumpy

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Sarah Palin

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Whats worse than contracting H.I.V.? nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why did the hipster hate black people? Because he was racist.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

A BABY seal walks into a club

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Q: why did Helen Keller's dog kill himself? A: Because he couldn't stand to see his owner suffer through blindness and deafness and being the butt of hundreds of offensive and hurtful jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What is green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What is black, white and red all over? A nun in a blender

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Knock Knock Who's there? Boo Were your parents drunk when they named you?

thumb_up thumb_down +10

what does a jew want most for hanukkah? presents

thumb_up thumb_down

69.9

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Q:What colors make black? A:Nothing Thats a Shade

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Jesus

thumb_up thumb_down -8

You walk in to your room. 7 chickens on your bed.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

what's funnier than 1 Mecican? 2 Mexicans

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Two muffins are in an oven. One says "It's getting hot in here". The other one starts to reply but then it's internal organs burst from the heat.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

An old man gets into a van with two little boys. They are his grandsons.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the middle of the oceon? Dead in the water.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A man walked into a bar. What did he say? Ouch.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

How many dead babies can you fit in a trash can? 12- 18 (depending on size) I know this because i use to work at a abortion clinic

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Your a Jew, I don't like you.

thumb_up thumb_down -80

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops