Q: what is more sad than being alone A: being alone with lots of cats

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why did the chicken cross the road? It is a domestic bird in the wild that is free to go where ever it wants to, that's why

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5

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"Ask me if I'm a billboard" "Are you a billboard?" "No"

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How did Helen Keller become blind and deaf? Scarlet fever or meningitis.

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Roses are red Violets are purple I just got raped by a clown

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Why did the chess grandmaster lose his mind? Because he died of old age.

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What did the orphan say to the other orphan? Annie is my favorite movie.

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My dog has no nose." "How does it smell?" "Potato"

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Want to hear a joke? Me to...

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What did the grass say to the human "Hey" The human then screams and runs to safety

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Knock knock. Who's there? Awkward silence Awkward silence who? ...

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What's 6 inches long, held in your hand, and has a round tip? A pencil you pervert.

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Why do Jewish people like money so much? Because they can exchange it for goods and services

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What did the guard say to the... I was going to finish this anti-joke but I took an arrow to the knee.

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What do you call a pig with no arms? A pig, pigs don't have arms

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Why did the girl say 'baa'? Because she was a lamb.

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What do you call an animal who is purple and feeds on grass? Well his name is Timmy, he is a 6 year old boy and has been diagnosed with a rare deadly disease that turns his skin purple and has removed him so far from reality that he has begin to feed on his front lawn.

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What did the nintendo Wii say as it went down the slide? They don't talk.

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scottishman walk into a gay bar. And why shoudn't they.

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What did the homosexual eat for breakfast? A light meal consisting of fruit and whole grains, so he could keep his weight down.

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A mother and her kid are in a park: Kid: Why did the chicken go to jail? Mother: Because the chicken killed your father... Now we are broke living in a park and I'm gonna kill myself at noon, and so are you. Kid: I'm not doing that, and neither are you and Daddies over their! The dad is a zombie, this is the beginning of the zombie apocalypses. THE END!!! PUPPIES!!!!!!!!!

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Why did the cow cross the road? To get to the slaughter house

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Hey Tim lets think of a joke

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops