What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come back from camp

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Roses are red Violets are blue i have a gun get in the van

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A Frenchman, an Irishman, and a Russian walk into a bar. The Frenchman orders a glass of wine, the Irishman orders a whisky, and the Russian, who prefers to be sober, orders a glass of water. They have an all-around pleasant night, yet they leave the bar upset. Why? A severe water contamination in the town resulted in the Russian man consuming a fatal dose of arsenic.

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Yo momma is so stupid when she drove to Disney World she saw that said "Disney World Left" so she turned on her turn signal and made a left turn. She promptly arrived at Disney World but realized she had left her wallet at the hotel.

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Why is Ray Charles always smiling? He's not, corpses rarely smile

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How many dead babies does it take to fill a bathtub? 17.

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What would happen if you put avocando, pineapple, sardines, peanut butter, brussel sprouts and milk into a blender and drank it. most probabley salmonala poisoning because the sardines were off.

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why can't hellen keller eat a pizza? because she is dead.

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That awkward moment when... Your mom is a guy.

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What did the man say while he was in surgery? Nothing, he was in surgery.

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Whats the differance between a blond and a rock? I don't know. I can't think of any.

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How would I re-arrange the alphabet? I would place P in your butt...

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Why did little Suzan fall of the swing? She has no arms. Knock,Knock Who's there? Not Suzan

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How did the man die? A gorilla raped him

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Roses are Red. Violets are blue. I took a shit on your wife's face last night.

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Q. What has four legs, but can't walk? A. A dog dying of a serious illness...

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in 2001 a man was working happily in his office cubicle and got an email from his boss saying that he had great news for him. filled with excitment he knew he was getting A big promotion and could finally afford that new toy his kid has always wanted. Feeling great the man walks up to the office window to enjoy the view he notices a very large commercial airliner flying straight towards his office.

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Why are you bored? because fungus grows in your eyeballs so you try to stab it out but you end up blind and dead lol

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Kitana vs Shao Kahn. Kitana: HIAHIAHIAHIA...etc Kahn: You weak pathetic whor... OARGH! Kahn: FINISH ME!!! Kitana: Dad? Again? Okay the last time then... Kahn: I just addopted you you FUC... Oargh Oargh Oargh Oargh Oargh... OOF!! OFF!! OFF!! OFF! Kitana: *slurp okay no more for you I am uh... full, seriously, Ill explode or some other Fatality... Woody Allenality... Kahn: Kontinue? (press start to kontinue free play mode)

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What's worse than public speaking? Public masterbation. *Spelled it wrong purposly to bypass the filter*

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Hitler.. Hitlar... Hillar... Hillary Clinton

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Why did Muhammad pray to Jesus? Because he has low self esteem and didn't believe in himself.

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Why was the boy crying? Because he had a frog stapled to his face

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why did the chicken cross the road? to try and stop the rapist from sodomizing his young child but his atempts were futile as the rapist shot him and used his blood as lubricant when he skull-raped his dying wife

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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