Why did the boy have glass in his mouth? Because he was chewing on glass.

whats black and doesnt work? a broken black toaster

people can be soooo loud!!!!!!! sooo loud that they wake up helen keller!!!!!!

Q: why didn't johnny do his homework? A:because johnny is dead

what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? when people don't understand the concept of anti-jokes and post real jokes

What do you give hobos? Febreeze

Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

What's brown and red but looks purple? Mixed paint!

Why Didnt John Return any of his calls he was in a very serious car accident fell into a coma and will probablly will not wake up ever again

What happens when you throw a red rock into a purple river? It gets wet...

what do call a large massacre of 1000000 people? a tragedy

Knock Knock. Whose there? Bond. Bond who? James Bond. na-na NA NA na-na na

What did the lesbian say to the hot dog? "nice to MEAT you" get it the hot dog is made of meat!

Q: What did Albert Einstein say to Adolf Hitler? A: They never talked. And if Albert Einstein did say something to Adolf Hitler, he would have died first.

Who is John Galt?

How do you kill a diabetic? Take away their insuline

What is the #1 cause of pedophiles? Sexy children

How do you kill a blonde? You stab her.

What does an Asian do in a library in his school? Write one of these.

Knock knock. who's there? your dead cat, here you go.

roses ar red violets ar blue i have aids

What's worse then 2 dead monkeys? 3 dead monkeys!

What’s big, grey, has wrinkly skin, and a trunk? An elephant. Oh, you’ve heard this one.

Whats the difference between a garage full of dead babies and a garage full of money? I don't have a garage full of money

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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