Q: What's the difference between an African American and a bench? A: An African American is a human being of black dissent, while a bench is an inanimate object that people sit on.

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first koala. Why did the man fall of his bike? He was struck with a falling koala. Why did the fish fall of its bike? Because it's a fish. What is fuzzy and might kill you if it falls on you? A pool table.

why did the blond stare at a carton of orange juice for 2 hours? because she was reading the nutrition list, and she is a slow and patient reader.

Three nuns walk into a bar. They realize they are in a place they don't want to be, so they leave, casting furtive glances around, fearing that someone from their congregation will see them and think they went in to drink.

Why do immigrants move to the UK? To seek a better life

Why did the girl say 'baa'? Because she was a lamb.

Your mother is so dumb. It's a good thing she knows sign language.

why did the boy drop his ice cream? he tripped over his mother's dead body

What's the difference between a white man and a black man? Nothing. They are both created in God's image and likeness so get your mind outta the gutter!

Ice cream You scream We all scream Because there is a murderer killing our friends

A man walked in a bar had 4 drinks and walked home because drunk driving is dangerous

Richard fell off of a cliff. He can fly.

Knock Knock Who's there? Boo Were your parents drunk when they named you?

Knock Knock "Who's There?" *No answer* The man proceeds to go on with his life

A woman got in her car to drive to work. She kept her hands on the wheel and eyes on the road and was able to avoid any accidents that could have occurred.

How long does it take a black woman to take a shit? Why in the world would you want to know something like that? But anyway, the answer is somewhere, on average, between 10 seconds and 15 minutes. It really varies and conditions like irritable bowel syndrome and constipation affect this range. Actually it takes about 9 months.

It's black, and when it falls out of a tree, your refrigurator is broken. Your refrigurator.

why did the banana go to the doctor? answer: he wasnt peeling well lollolololloololololololololololololooolololololololol i just fell of my dinosaur

What are corpses favorite form of entertainment? nothing, there dead.

What did the grass say to the human "Hey" The human then screams and runs to safety

Knock, knock. Who's there? Butter. Butter who? Oh, um, sorry i forgot the rest...

What do you get when you cross Chuck Norris with a Cheetah? A yellow Chuck Norris with black spots.

What's worse then biting into an apple and finding a worm in it? The spelling errors on anti-jokes.com

What did the phone say to the telephone? I can't connect with you.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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