An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scottishman walk into a gay bar. And why shoudn't they.

Q: what is more sad than being alone A: being alone with lots of cats

You walk in to your room. 7 chickens on your bed.

Q:What colors make black? A:Nothing Thats a Shade

How did Helen Keller become blind and deaf? Scarlet fever or meningitis.

Roses are red Violets are purple I just got raped by a clown

Tony Blair, Micheal Jordan, Fabrice Muamba, Aunty Josephine, Nick Clegg, David Cameron, and myself all go out for drinks.

Why did the pollock jump into the sea? A pollock is a fish.

Why did the chess grandmaster lose his mind? Because he died of old age.

Your momma's so fat... She's on a diet.

Want to hear a joke? Me to...

What's worse then biting into an apple and finding a worm in it? The spelling errors on anti-jokes.com

Knock knock. Who's there? Awkward silence Awkward silence who? ...

Why do Jewish people like money so much? Because they can exchange it for goods and services

What is the difference between a botlle of sun lotion and a Mexican? A bottle of sun lotion contains a lotion that protects your skin against the sun, and a Mexican is a person from Mexico.

My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well, I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

Why was the woman making a sandwhich in the kitchen? She was hungry.

I have sex daily, I mean dyslexia.

Did you hear about the kidnapping yesterday? He slept for at least 3 hours.

What did the guard say to the... I was going to finish this anti-joke but I took an arrow to the knee.

roses are red, violets are blue, i have a gun, shut the **** up.

A BABY seal walks into a club

Why did the chicken cross the road? A scorpion was trying to sting it in the anus and it wanted to escape the undoubtedly painful consequences.

So there's this mexican with a big sombrero riding a donkey, it was a sunny day and he didn't feel like walking.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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