whats the difference between ur mom and my mom? nothing i slept with both of them

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why is a cookie like a jellyfish? Because it has no bones. (Contributed by my 4-year old boy)

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it did not realize it was a man-made distinction for constructed transportation vehicles and had a coincidental tendency to walk toward the area on the other side to find food or avoid birds flying over.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's harder than steel? Beating Tetris. What's harder than diamond? Beating Tetris...

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She didn't. Her head was stuck in the oven.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do Michael Jackson and Donkey Kong have in common? They're both famous.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

why did the chicken cross the road? to try and stop the rapist from sodomizing his young child but his atempts were futile as the rapist shot him and used his blood as lubricant when he skull-raped his dying wife

thumb_up thumb_down +4

what's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? a Jew is a person and a pizza is a food

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's white and sticky? A white stick.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? It's socially acceptable to sit on a bench.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Sticks and stones may break my bones.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the boy fall of of his bicycle? He was hit by an asteroid.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

There are 3 guys named:Poop, Shut up and Manners. They all were speeding down the street, they took a sharp turn and Poop fell out of the back. A cop pulled them over while Manners got out to go get Poop. The cop says, "whats your name." "Shut up." "No seriously whats your name." "Shut up" he says a little bit harsher. "Wheres your manners?" the cop says. "Back there picking up Poop."

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's worse than a pile of dead babies A live one eating its way out!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Knock knock. Who's there? ... Damn knick knockers.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

- Mommy look, I built a sandcastle! - Who cares, you have cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Your momma is so stupid Her iq must be below 50

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did George Washington say to his men before they got on a boat? Men, get on the boat

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the mountains? A: Bear food.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the little girl die so suddenly? The bullet got her right in the heart.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Many of people would like to know this question. We have not invented a mind reading device and chickens can't communicate with humans. So no one knows

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Two Muffins in an oven One muffin looks at the other muffin and says: "Oohhhh it's hot in here!". Then the other muffin says: "Oohhhh a talking muffin!"

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the guy playing Monopoly sell Boardwalk for $100 to the woman wearing an exotic outfit which shows off her boobs but wouldn't sell Boardwalk for $1000 to the other person that was playing the game? The other person had Park Place as well which would have given them a monopoly on the blue property if he had sold it to that person. And $100 is all the girl had or he would have asked for more but he needed the $100 in order to pay this other player and keep himself from going bankrupt after landing on one of his Hotels.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

9 Cats on a boat. One Jumped off, how many left? 8.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops