i love u. so rate me good or i will talk to my lawyer. nothing personal, i just have no arms, legs, or nose and got broken up with by a girlfriend yesterday (and no, she was not fake) Her name was maria. On the bright side, my grandma woke up this morning!

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Roses are der, Violets are lube, I am dyslexic.

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What's the biggest difference between the East and West Coast? About 3,000 miles.

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The meme walks out of the bar.

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A man walked into a bar, he then fell to the ground screaming in pain.

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What do you call a woman with a penis? A Hermaphrodite.

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knock! knock! who's there? mom mom who? your mom... your girlfriend just died in a car accident while carrying you baby...

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What's more stinky than a fart? More farts.

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Knock knock Who's there? A friend. But I don't have any friends.

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nick toth

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Q: How did Muhamid Ali ( casius clay ) get a black eye? A: He was born

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Why did Sally fall of the Swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not Sally

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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On a scale of one to 10, F*ck yourself.

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Why was the globe sad? Because it was cut in half.

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Why wouldnt NASA send a blackman into space without a space suit? Because space is a vacuum there is no air no atmosphere the tempurature is almost zero kelvin so if you ever go out int space please dont take off your helmet out there because you would freeze to death almost instantaniously.

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What do you call a donkey walking backwards a confused donkey

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Why did the vegetarian only work one day? Because her co-workers are cannibals.

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Why did the boy kill his father? Because he was molesting him.

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Why did the girl buy wine? She was hosting a party for four of her closest friends.

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My Roomate-(crying in the fetal position for the love of his life has been murderer) Me- (laughing) I have a problem

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Why wasn't the 7 year old boy happy? I shot him

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What did the phone say to the telephone? I can't connect with you.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, most likely, the chicken escaped from a near by ranch or farm. Upon escaping, he may have simply wandered in the direction of the road, and hence crossed it. Or, with chickens having great curiosity, may have been attracted to something on the other side of the road and felt the urge to explore. Depending on the demographics of the area in which road was in, the chicken had different chances of being hit by an automobile. That's why.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops