How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face (pokerface)

what do giraffes have that other animals don't have? -baby giraffes

What did the deaf Jewish Rabbi say to the Italian Priest. What?

Three people walk into a bar. Eight people follow them. They all go back to Bob's house, except Anna, Jimmy, and Joe. TImes the amount of people going to Bob's house by four. Thats how many people get arrested at the end of the night. How many people aren't arrested? Do you even know why you read this? Get a life and go to an actual bar, a party and get arrested.

Why can't Jay cut his hair? Because he has AIDS

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?? Because it Died

Why did the fat man fall faster than the skinny man? He didn't. Masses does not affect the speed of falling objects. Everything with mass and volume falls with an acceleration of 9.81m/s^2 on Earth. Therefore the greater mass of the heavier man did not affect his falling speed. Both men fell at the same speed.

Q: why are kittens so cute? A: because god created them that way. go fourth and enjoy kittens.

you: knock knock person: who's there you: interrupting cow person: interrupting cow you:MOOOOOOOOO

Why did Benjamin Franklin go to the movies? Dim message, sapi message=InputBox("Find Out","Why did Benjamin Franklin Go To the Movies?") Set sapi=CreateObject("sapi.spvoice") sapi.Speak message

i was molested.

What was the Alzheimer patient favorite drink? What was the Alzheimer patient favorite drink?

A man walks into a bar He says ouch

(Q) Why did the little boy cross the road? (A) To get to the police officer. (Q) Why did the little boy need the police officer? (A) because he was raped.

whats annoying and black? black people

What did the lawyer get for Christmas? More paper work

What did the duck say to the man? Nothing. Ducks cannot talk.

Bobby got a new bike there are black kids in bobby's neighborhood bobby doesnt have a new bike anymore

what did the duck say to the chicken .nothing

What happened when a boy threw a ball at the wall? It hit him in the face

Kid 1: "Want a Hurts Doughnut?" Kid 2: "Umm... sure." Kid 1 opens up a box of freshly baked Hurts doughnut from Hurts Bakery and gives one to kid 2

Two people on a boat, Pete and Repete. Pete fell off and Repete radioed the Coast Guard, who sadly got there just in time to watch him drown to his death.

What did the man want a car for his birthday? 7.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven ate nine.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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