What did the grass say to the human "Hey" The human then screams and runs to safety

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what did one caterpillar say to another caterpillar? let's be butterflies

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Why did the girl buy wine? She was hosting a party for four of her closest friends.

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My Roomate-(crying in the fetal position for the love of his life has been murderer) Me- (laughing) I have a problem

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How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One

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Why was the asian boy get straight A's? He paid attention during class, took good notes, studied at home, and had a personal drive that lead him to be a good student.

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman immediately calls the local stable to report the missing stallion, and his owner promptly arrives to take him home. He thanks the landlord and offers a small reward, but it is respectfully declined.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

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Knock knock. Who's there? I just ding dong ditched you.

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What starts with an F and ends with a UCK? Firetruck.

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Knock knock Who's there? A friend. But I don't have any friends.

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What's the difference between black people and white people? Their skin color.

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nick toth

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"Ask me if I'm a billboard" "Are you a billboard?" "No"

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A black man and a hispanic man are riding in a car. Who's driving? The hispanic man

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Why are atheists stupid? Actually, statistically, they are more intelligent than believers.

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Little Johnny asks his father how babies are made. So the father rapes him from behind.

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Q:What are black basketball players good at? A:Running,shooting and stealing.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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What runs faster than a nigger with a stolen tv? His brother with the remote

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What happens when a japanese boy goes into a planet called Zypharecion which is 2000 light years away with 20% oxygen and 78% nitrogen and 2% of other earthly air elements and heats up a balloon enough that it explodes? He wont be at that planet because it does not exist and travelling at the speed of light has not been proven possible for humans.

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yo mama so fat that she should be concerned because diabetes is a serious issue

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Why did the blond fall of the ladder? She had no arms.

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i love u. so rate me good or i will talk to my lawyer. nothing personal, i just have no arms, legs, or nose and got broken up with by a girlfriend yesterday (and no, she was not fake) Her name was maria. On the bright side, my grandma woke up this morning!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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