A man walks into a bar He says ouch

Your mom smells so bad that she proceeded to take a shower and then didnt smell bad at all.

What was the biggest turning point during Michael Vick's transformation from despised felon to MVP candidate? He stopped killing dogs.

what did the duck say to the chicken .nothing

Knock, Knock The door's open

Knock knock Who's there? Labrinth Come in

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What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Being cut in half by a human while you were trying to eat an apple

A man walked into a bar, he then fell to the ground screaming in pain.

women's rights

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

Why was school cancelled? Because the school was bombed.

A blonde walks into a salon and says "I would like to get my golden locks trimmed." The haircutter replies "surely, just sit yourself down in that chair over there and I'll be with you momentarily." The blonde walks to the chair and sits down. When the haircutter comes over he asks her, "would you please remove your headset, I can't cut your hair while they're on." She laughs at her forgetfulness and removes them obligingly.

what did micheal jackson give to a young boy? -nothing micheal jackson is dead

What jew get for christmas? Your money.

An Irishman walks into a bar. He gets extremely drunk and gets hit by a train.

what do giraffes have that other animals don't have? -baby giraffes

Three people walk into a bar. Eight people follow them. They all go back to Bob's house, except Anna, Jimmy, and Joe. TImes the amount of people going to Bob's house by four. Thats how many people get arrested at the end of the night. How many people aren't arrested? Do you even know why you read this? Get a life and go to an actual bar, a party and get arrested.

What do the Holocaust and baseball have in common? They are sports, except the Holocaust.

A black man and a hispanic man are riding in a car. Who's driving? The hispanic man

Chuck Norris doesn't sleep. He has insomnia.

How many women are in the world? a little over 3.2 billion because statistics show that there are roughly 51-52% females in the whole population of humans

Whats brown and rhymes with Snoop?...... Dr Dre.

Why shouldnt you throw rocks at a black kid on a bike? Because the kid wasn't riding in your way, you could get arrested for assault and battery, and he probably lives in a low income area and cant afford health insurance if he was injured.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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