Why was little Timmy afraid of his dentist? Because he was 10 foot scorpion.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Roses are red Violets are red My lawn is red My fences are red It appears my garden is on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

A man walks into a bar, he then gets a giant bump on his head as he passes out and is rushed to the hospital.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

How do you annoy a farmer? Shoot his wife.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm random but can still rhyme Hatsune Miku

thumb_up thumb_down +31

A wise man once said, "I am wise".

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Q: What is the proper name for a female dog? A: Well there could be several names it could be a name on the collar in which case please look for the number so it can be returned to its owner. Another possibility is that it is a stray which you should either run for it could have a disease and you should just forget about the name then or take it in as your own and name it.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What did the Mexican say to the Pirate? Hi, Steve!

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A red and blue penguin are taking showers. The red penguin can't find the soap so he yells down the hall to the blue penguin "Hey, where is my soap?" The blue penguin replies, "What do I look like a typewriter?"

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A little boy running with scissors he trips and falls and dies

thumb_up thumb_down +29

get off me you fat b*tch or i will mash you up like a potato

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the chipmunk fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What did the man get from killing his own wife and children? A boner.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Your momma is so stupid, because she didn't get a proper education

thumb_up thumb_down +29

How did the Mexican get into the United States? He showed his passport, and the correct documents & information, and was admitted into the country as a new American citizen.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What did the caninibol do when he duped his girlfriend He wiped

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Q: what white hard and huge and it can kill you if you fall out of a tree? A: a refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Row, row, row your... Canoe.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

How many Druggies does it take to make toast. One.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What did the raped girl get for Christmas? Pregnant.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Doctor Doctor i've got wind can you give me something? Thats not wind the doctor replies thats a rare form of stomach cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

whats your budget like? a budget.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What is Helen Keller's favorite color? Velcro

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What's brown and sticky? Molasses.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops