Burger King cashier: Are you on Team Jacob or Team Edward? Man: I'm on team I'm freaking hungry; now give me my food!

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What's black and white and red all over? And old fashioned television painted red.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the middle of the oceon? Dead in the water.

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whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff

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Every 60 seconds in Africa, a minute passes.

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Whats worse than falling down the stairs? Falling UP the stairs.

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Where do bananas come from? Mexico

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whats worse than getting beaten up by a bully? realizing your fly was down the whole time and getting beaten up by a bully

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what is brown with wheels? a potatoe, i was just kidding about the wheels

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I've got a boner

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Why didn't the dog like baseball? Being a dog, it had no idea or interest in what baseball is.

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What did the girl get for her birthday? Nothing...cause she died

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What did the phone say to the telephone? I can't connect with you.

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Bobby got a new bike there are black kids in bobby's neighborhood bobby doesnt have a new bike anymore

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Q: What happened to the teenage girl and the serial rapist at Denny's around midnight? A: They both ordered the french toast Grand Slam breakfast (at Denny's, its breakfast any time!!).

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If you lose your left arm, your right one will be left.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Your landlord. I'm here to collect rent

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Yee

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What came first, the chicken or the egg? Neither. The single celled amoeba. As billions of years passed, the simple amoeba began to form limbs which it utilized to crawl its way out of the ocean onto dry land. Millions of years would pass before the simplified organism began to develop into a fully functional chicken.

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What looks and sounds just like a seagull ? A seagull.

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Oxygen and magnesium are going out OMG Think science the you might get it If not O oxygen mg magnesium

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Yo mamma is so pretty, she is frequently complimented on her good looks.

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A: Knock knock! B: A: Guess no one's home.

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What is big, green and fuzzy and if it falls out of a tree and hit you in the head, it will probably kill you? A pool table.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops