Knock Knock! Who's there? Your landlord. I'm here to collect rent

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What's the difference between a rabbit and a plum? They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

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(insert antijoke here

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What did the White guy say to the Black Guy? "Hey, what's up?"

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Q-- Why did the boy stop playing football? A -- He had to go for his tea

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs on your porch? Matt.

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If thin people skinny dip, what do fat people do? Sink

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What did the FBI agent say to the CIA agent. We're both agents

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How do wake up Lady Gaga You Poker her face

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Why did the aeroplane engine fallon the house? Because of Donnie Darko

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How many black people does it take to screw in a lightbulb?. I dont know either it was dark.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

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your mama is so stupid i believe she will have a difficult time finding employment in these rough economic times

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Knock, Knock The door's open

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A man walked into a bar, he then fell to the ground screaming in pain.

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What's a bit smaller than the tallest man in the world? The 2nd tallest man in the world.

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A black, a muslim, and a communist walk into a bar, the bartender says "what will it be Mr. President?

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what did the hobo do when he saw timmy get hit by the bus and drop his ice cream? stole the ice cream and laughed

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There are 3 type of people in the world. People who can count, and people who can't.

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Three people walk into a bar. Eight people follow them. They all go back to Bob's house, except Anna, Jimmy, and Joe. TImes the amount of people going to Bob's house by four. Thats how many people get arrested at the end of the night. How many people aren't arrested? Do you even know why you read this? Get a life and go to an actual bar, a party and get arrested.

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Whats worse than the holocaust? A n a l

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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GONNA

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i was molested.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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