Q. Knock Knock A. Whose there? Q. how am i supposed to know why don't you answer it and find out you dumb ass! gosh.... people and their common sense these days!!

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face"? The horse does not respond, because it is a horse and lacks any cognitive ability to speak or understand English. Instead, it becomes confused by its surroundings, takes a dump on the floor, and gallops out of the bar knocking a few tables over in the process.

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A: why do elephants paint their toenails red? B: why? A: so they can hide in cherry trees B: I don't get it A: have you ever seen an elephant in a cherry tree? B: no... A: exactly

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Eh yo Sean u mr. Kingston Hey, how are you doing?

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How do you get someone to come out of the closet? Unlock it

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What is big, hard, and bushy? My Penis. I lied about it being bushy.

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Yo momma so fat that they've diagnosed her with type 2 diabetes and she has an extremely elevated risk of heart disease. You should really encourage her to try and eat better and get more exercise.

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A man walks into a bar. He leaves a large rucksack by the pool table and walks out. The rucksack then explodes and kills 13 people because it is the height of the Troubles and the man is a member of the IRA, who targetted the bar because it is regularly visited by British servicemen. The media extensively cover the story, and the two sides of the conflict in Northern Ireland decide that the bloodshed must stop, which eventually made way to the Good Friday agreement of 1998.

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Q: What did the redneck say when he ran out of beer? A: I need more beer.

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what is big and white? Your Mom

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whats the difference between sand and period blood? You cannot gargle sand.

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What's the last thing to go through a flys head when it hits your windshield? Its ass.

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What did the Wind say to the Window? (Insert Racist punchline here)

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What happened when the ugly girl asked her crush out on a date? He said yes. He found her personality quite attractive

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A black man walks into a store and grabs something off of a shelf. He walk briskly towards the door and pauses, looking sneakily left and right to make sure nobody else is around. He also looks and sees that the security camera is not facing him. Seeing as nobody is watching him, he quickly turns towards the counter beside the door and pays for the item with his own debit card, knowing that nobody can see him enter his PIN.

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Yo mamma's so fat that the gravity required to keep her on the ground is significantly smaller than an average sized human.

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roses are red violets are blue I have five fingers and the middle one is for u

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What's been hit millions of times? A woman married to an abusive husband.

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How does a black guy die? He doesn't , he's black

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the food supply was scarce

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some men like Cheese, I have aids.

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Yo momma so stupid she scored poorly on her SAT's in high school. She couldn't graduate college and now works a dead end job as a waitress.

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What do babies suck on? juice boxes!

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7 chickens ran down the road. One ate a spider. He is now the fattest chicken.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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