Five little monkeys jumping on the bed One fell off and bumped his head Mama called the doctor and the doctor said "There is no cure for the monkeys in your head"

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Rebecca Black

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What did the orphan get for his birthday? Shit on.

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I drive a 'rarri

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K O O K A B U R R A . . . . . . . . . . ReTweet

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guess what im a bitch i have no balls and i can slap your mum in the face

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Why did the man need new glasses? He was thrown off a bridge by a leprechaun.

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why didnt the little boy say goodbye to his mom because he got hit by a bus

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Is it a bird, is it a plane?! No it's.... It's a bird.

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A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 30 years later he would gamble away his family's life savings and then go onto live a long and unfulfilled life.

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the little boy got in a ice cream truck he cant sit down anymore

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Why did the black man kill his girlfriend? Because it was his mom!

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what happend when the little boy went on the rollercoaster ? It crashed.

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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How do I get to Carnegie Hall? The address is 881 Seventh Avenue at 57th street in New York. it's beside the Russian Tea Room and almost directly across from the IESE school of business. The Russian Tea Room has a large bright red awning out front and a large carving of three dancing bears on the face of the building, the bears are covered in gold leaf. You can't miss it.

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what did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? cancer

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A man walks into a bar and poops his pants. He left because of the embarrassment.

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what do you call a polar bear in a bathtub? No soap, radio

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What's black and white and read all over? Michael Jackson bleeding, I spelled " red" wrong

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How do they call a black man that works in a mine. Miner.

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why did the golfer ware two ares of paents. if he got a hole in one

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Whats worse then 10 black men hanging from trees? Kittens

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Justin

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Did you ever notice that if you blow in a dogs face it goes mad, yet when you take him on a car ride he sticks his head straight out the window?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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