What is spiky and opens up wide? The Mouth…what were you thinking you perv?

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A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

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A man with Alztheimers walks into a bar. He forgets the purpose of being there.

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How many Jews can you fit in an oven? None, it's illegal.

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how do you wake up a black man? scream!!!!!

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What's black, white and red all over? A nun that's just been shot.

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A man walks into a bar. Suddenly, he is filled with a strange feeling, as if his life is somehow the subject of a stupid joke. He walks back out of the bar and consults a psychiatrist.

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why did the chicken cross the road? the sudden lack of sidewalk dictated as such.

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why did the mom beat up her son with downs because he was matt daly

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How can you tell if there is an idiot at a dogfight? When someone pits a Chihuahua. How can you tell if there is a moron at a dogfight? When someone BETS on the Chihuahua. How can you tell if there is a cheater at a dogfight? When the victory goes to the Chihuahua.

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There once was a plain Cheerio. He has a decent life with a low paying job and an apartment. One day, he decided to make his life more fun and started going to parties. He met some women and had a good time. He was happier and was soon promoted at work. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself, only to discover that he was now a Honey-nut Cheerio. He continued to go to parties and met a girl that eventually became his girlfriend. He became a manager at work and moved into an expensive condo. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself and was a Frosted Cheerio. He then quit his job and opened a club, where he became the most popular Cheerio in town. All guys wanted to be him, girls with him. At one party, his girlfriend asked him for some punch. He went to the kitchen but couldn't find any. There was no punch-line.

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What did the man say to the woman giving him a blowjob? That feels good.

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who do we all like george goodburn

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Roses are red, violets are blue, why am i even talking to you?

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whats worse than finding half a worm in your apple? being wrongly accussed of a crime you didnt commit because of your race, and being put on death row

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Q: What did the ant say to the bush? A: Ernest Borgnine

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Erron, who the hell do you work for? I thought we where friends, allies! We have not done anything illegal ever!

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ur mamas so ugly cause when she looked up at the sky it started to rain

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Why do girls like nikki minaj? Because she raps good. -Avery Vartanian

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Why did the Chicken cross the Road? To get to the other side! (To fully appreciate the subtle nuisances of this joke, you really have to be a chicken.)

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What do you call an Islamic man fling a plane? A very frightened passenger who took over flying the plane when the pilot collapsed due to a heart attack

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Roses are brown Violets are brown What the hell who keeps shitting in my garden

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Roses are red Violets are blue Im tired Cheese on toast

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you got Lady Gaga, Taylor Swift, and Reese Witherspoon. Which do you think is more succesful

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops