Knock knock. Who's there? Your neighbor.

How could they tell Michael Jackson was dead? He showed no vital signs.

what is worse then stubbing your toe in the dark? -september 11th

how many indians does it take to screw in a light bulb? one if it can reach 2 if it's high.One to screw in the bulb the other to hold the ladder.

A seal walks into a club...

how do you make a joke act like yourself

What couldn't the stereotypical pirate get into the movie? Well, considering that the stereotypical pirate existed in the sixteenth to eightteenth centuries and the first motion picture wasn't made until the mid to late nineteenth century, also the technology for time travel does not exist nor has it ever, I would have to derive that he was not let in due to the fact that there was no way for him to ever exist at the same time that a movie would have been playing.

What's the most stupid thing you have ever heard? Woman's Studies.

A Woman out of the kitchen

What's 6 inches long, held in your hand, and has a round tip? A pencil you pervert.

what do you call skiediving? a very fun but moderatly dangerouse sport that many people have fun doing from the ages of 19 to 31

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? He said, "Where's my tractor?"

What does a turkey do? I don't know I'm not a turkey

Q: why did the boy cross the road A: because he was being chased by a pedophile

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "why the long face?". The horse doesn't reply because horse can't talk.

Why didn't little jimmy get anything for Christmas? He is Jewish.

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

WOMENS RIGHTS

An Irishman walks into a bar. He gets extremely drunk and gets hit by a train.

A man walks into a bar. He has three drinks, then he leaves because he realizes he needs to get home because he has to get up early to go to his job in the morning.

A man and his family walk into a talent agent's office. The man proceeds to sexually accost his wife and children. The agent calls security who escort the family out and helps the wife find a domestic violence shelter to stay at.

What's the difference between me and a dead baby? I'm not dead, or a baby. I am well into my teens and very healthy.

Two blondes are walking down the street. One breaks her left high heel and the other is called Monica.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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