What did the woman say to her husband after he came home from a late night of drinking? Nothing, because the last time she did, she got her ass beat.

Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

Knock knock Who's there? Timmy Timmy who? Timmy Smith

Knock Know Who's there Interrupting ghost Interu--BOO!!! Ha HA!

A man walked into a bar, he then fell to the ground screaming in pain.

What looks and sounds just like a seagull ? A seagull.

What did the nintendo Wii say as it went down the slide? They don't talk.

Why did the one pound coin cross the road? It was stuck up the chickens ass

A dog walks into a bar, looks at the bartender, lifts its leg and pisses on a bar stool. What does the bartender do ? He chases the dog out the bar and gets a mop to mop up the piss.

A cow walks into a bar and says, "moo."

There was a Mexican in a bomb shop ?

How do you kill a blond? You don't. If you do, you'll get reported to the cops and sent to jail.

Boom.

Two blondes are walking down the street. One breaks her left high heel and the other is called Monica.

Why did the chiken cross the road. Anwer: because it was being chased by a crazy horny/ kinky redneck.

A Polish man came home one day from work, hung up his coat, took off his hat and walked into his bedroom shouting "honey I'm home!" What should he see but his best friend in bed with his wife. Infuriated, he rushed to the cupboard, pulled out his gun, put it to his head, pulled the trigger, and died instantly. His children and lecherous wife are forever scarred.

What did one muffin in the oven say to the other muffin Nothing food doesn't talk

why do holocasut jokes make us laugh? i dont know you tell me

Three nuns accidentally walked in to a bar and so they immediately went out.

what did the girl trapped in the fire say? help

What kind of animal eats and pisses on everything? Your mother. -Avery Vartanian

What's the biggest difference between the East and West Coast? About 3,000 miles.

Q: why did the boy cross the road A: because he was being chased by a pedophile

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know why, but I was standing on the other side of the road and I took it home and mamed the chicken with a powerdrill.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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