Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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Roses are red, violets are blue, why am i even talking to you?

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If your yacht is if moving at 50 knots per hour in a wind tunnel how many leprechauns can you fit in a chamber? Even, because purple is attracted to bestiality.

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What do you call a guy who has sex with kids? A child molester

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Why was the man angry? Because I slept with his wife.

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What did one man say to the other? I'm a Mormon.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Fishsticks

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Why did the girl fall off the couch? She had a seizure.

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What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

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What do you call a redneck in a propane store? A customer.

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if I had sex with your mother?

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What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have cancer."

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What do you call a horse with no eyes? A horse with no eyes.

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how did the bloop cross the road? to get to the other side

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Q: What do a dildo salesman and a car salesman have in common? A: They are both salesman

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what the hell happened to your face

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Q: What did the first kid say to the second kid before he handed him a pencil? A: May I have a pencil?

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Knock Knock. who's there? It's me. you need to be specific...

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Why didn't the African kid eat lunch? He wasn't hungry.

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What's green and invisible? This cabbage.

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Why did the blind man cross the road? To end the suffering of a lifetime illness.

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i said wut wut in the butt!

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What's white and cant jump? A Fridge

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops