Why did the boy get hit by a wrecking ball? Because he picked up an upside down penny.

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5 Christians, 4 Arabs, 3 Jews, and a Monkey are locked in a room with sticky bombs, hand grenades, a bible, and some bananas. What do they do? play scrabble

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How do you piss off a teacher? Accuse them of being a pedophile

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John went to the shop to purchase a can of coca cola. He left the shop with a can of coca cola.

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Why did the little kids call the boy "pornboy" Because he showed gay porn at the bus stop

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There once was a plain Cheerio. He has a decent life with a low paying job and an apartment. One day, he decided to make his life more fun and started going to parties. He met some women and had a good time. He was happier and was soon promoted at work. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself, only to discover that he was now a Honey-nut Cheerio. He continued to go to parties and met a girl that eventually became his girlfriend. He became a manager at work and moved into an expensive condo. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself and was a Frosted Cheerio. He then quit his job and opened a club, where he became the most popular Cheerio in town. All guys wanted to be him, girls with him. At one party, his girlfriend asked him for some punch. He went to the kitchen but couldn't find any. There was no punch-line.

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"I am proud to be black and I wouldn't want to be any other race." - Not racist. "I am proud to be white and I wouldn't want to be any other race." - Racist and offensive to black people "I am proud to be asian and I wouldn't want to be any other race." - Not racist "I am proud to be Ethiopian and I wouldn't want to be any other race." - Said nobody, ever

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justin bieber: ask me if im a boy are you a boy? no.

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what goes woof ? A dog.

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What do you call something that lives in a pineapple under the sea? I don't know, but that seems like an improbable circumstance.

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How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood?  The woodchuck's ability to chuck has been left indeterminable. Therefore until the wood chuck's prowess in wood chucking is brought to light we must leave it a variable. Using the coefficient (L) to represent wood that can possibly be chucked. Then using (C) to represent the life cycle of said wood chuck chucking. We are also assuming this woodchuck will remain vigilante and not require food or sleep for the entire duration of chucking ultimately lowering is maximum chucking output. From this we can determine the W.C.P.S. (wood chucks per second). Finally subtract the remaining wood (RW) from the chucked total and we have rendered that :  L(W.C.P.S) - (C -RM/t) = X

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Why was a black person on the run, being trailed by police officers? They were all late to work; their work places were coincidentally situated near each other.

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Where did the farmer take his pigs on Saturday afternoon? the Slaughterhouse

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what did a ginger say to god? nothing gingers dont have souls and therefore cant go to heaven

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Why did the sailor fall off the boat? Because vampires arent real.

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What's black, white, black, white, black, white, and red? A horse with it's heard chopped off.

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whats worse than biting your apple and finding a worm? WWII.

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7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,8

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What is the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa? Santa stops after 3 hos

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What type of party do you throw when your fat? A baby shower.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree It was stapled to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree Peer pressure.

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Why did the little girl fall off of the swing set? Because she didn't have any arms.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because Acl tear stepped on a spit.

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Why was the boy sad? Because his family was raped and stripped of their possessions

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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