Q: How did that man get two black eyes? A: He was born!

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Three nuns accidentally walked in to a bar and so they immediately went out.

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What did Little Timmy say when his house fell down? I'm not sure but that sounds like a very sad event that I hope to never encounter in my personal experiences.

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What's 6 inches long, held in your hand, and has a round tip? A pencil you pervert.

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What did the doctor say to the Lawyer? I get paid more

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Dislike this!!!!!!

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What did the woman say to her husband after he came home from a late night of drinking? Nothing, because the last time she did, she got her ass beat.

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What happened when a boy threw a ball at the wall? It hit him in the face

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, Zebras.

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Knock Knock. Martha, get the door I'm watching the game!

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It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

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Two people on a boat, Pete and Repete. Pete fell off and Repete radioed the Coast Guard, who sadly got there just in time to watch him drown to his death.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer was arrested by the ASPCA and PETA for letting the chicken run free near a horribly busy road

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What did the homosexual eat for breakfast? A light meal consisting of fruit and whole grains, so he could keep his weight down.

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A man walks into a bar. He has three drinks, then he leaves because he realizes he needs to get home because he has to get up early to go to his job in the morning.

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Why is it hard to fool an aborted fetus? Because it wasn't born yesterday.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because my first shot missed.

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An old man gets into a van with two little boys. They are his grandsons.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a trash can? 12- 18 (depending on size) I know this because i use to work at a abortion clinic

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Wanna hear a joke? Sure. Too bad I don't have one.

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26.5% of Americans are obese.

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Knock, Knock. Come in.

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these jokes are terrible, even for anti-jokes

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What's the difference between mw2 and mw3? Nothing

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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