A seal walks into a club...

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Q: What did the diddler say to the little boy? A: Can i touch you inappropriately?

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What do you call a man with no arms and legs swimming? Drowning.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?? Because it Died

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There was a Mexican in a bomb shop ?

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When life throws you lemons, duck because they freakin' hurt.

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What do you call an Arab flying a plane? A pilot. *BOOM* Never mind, he was a terrorist.

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Why shouldnt you throw rocks at a black kid on a bike? Because the kid wasn't riding in your way, you could get arrested for assault and battery, and he probably lives in a low income area and cant afford health insurance if he was injured.

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Q: How did that man get two black eyes? A: He was born!

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What is colourful and explodes in the air. I don't know but it sounds cool!

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What has two legs and graduated from ninja school? Okyrin Sakajuru. He also went on to win two all city titles and roundhouse kick of the day, performed on a wild tiger. As time passes, he stops practicing and becomes a lethargic street criminal. He is eventually captured by local authorities and charged with the robberies and two counts of aggravated assault. Leaving his children behind to the system where they are neglected and depressed about their fathers situation. He makes bail after 3 months and opens a strip club for dwarfs but loses it all after not finding stripper poles that are dwarf friendly.

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what's blue and white and red all over? -nothing the "red all over" part implies a contradiction to blue and white.

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I Wish... I was Charlie Sheen's Dealer

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What did the blind, deaf, quadriplegic boy get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Knock, Knock The door's open

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Three nuns walk into a bar. They realize they are in a place they don't want to be, so they leave, casting furtive glances around, fearing that someone from their congregation will see them and think they went in to drink.

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What happened when a boy threw a ball at the wall? It hit him in the face

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a Jew had a small nose

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Women's Rights

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Why was the blonde so stupid? He had dyslexia and to make fun of his hardship would truly be a hardship of human morals.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a terrorist -lschles

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There are 3 type of people in the world. People who can count, and people who can't.

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Q: Why MohammadReza Is a Bitch? A: Because he isnt a whore

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Roses are red, violets are blue, why am i even talking to you?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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