Why did the boy get hit by a wrecking ball? Because he picked up an upside down penny.

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So I was walking down the road today

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? -Because he was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? -He was stapled to the first one Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? -He thought it was a game Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? -He had no arms Why did the girl fall off her bike? -She was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator

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Once upon a time there was a small poor boy in a small German village. Her was name Smalls. Later he found out that he had to go back to Virginia because of their family then she got milk and went to the play that night like he was planning, and it was probably a problem with the clutch or transmission. It was fine because Smalls was 64 years old.

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A man is walking down the street when he stumbles upon a school, every school in the area had an American flag outside it, so he sees the flag and atop this flag a man is sitting and he doesn’t look comfortable. Next to the flag pole is a chair with a flag attached to it and the wind is as strong low down. So he looks at the man and says "Sir I think you may be using those wrong." The man on the flagpole says "why?" So he says well this chair is flat and made for sitting and this flag pole has a draw string for the flag. The man atop the flag pole says "I'm sure good will come of this…..im sure." the man says "What good could possibly come of this!" and the man on top of the flag pole looks at him and says "Later……………..you can tell this story to your friends and disappoint them when they find out theirs no punchline."

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Knock Knock. - Whose there? ... ... ... ... Damn kids.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, some people are gay, and so are you

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why do women rip you off? Because they like money

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Why did Johnny lose the race he got jawed by a pack of chimpanzees

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What happens when an old lady bumps into a black man in the middle of the night? He politely offers her help getting home and she accepts.

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What is worse than getting stung by a bee? Watching your family die in a fire.

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Q:Whats rhe best part about spinning a baby round and round Stopping it with a shovel

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Why couldn't Kelly finish her test? She spontaneously combusted.

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What did the man who brutally raped and murdered his infant daughter say? He didn't.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Against city ordinates, an old woman was keeping chickens in her suburban back yard. One escaped, and there was no where else to go.

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What do dead babies and trash both have in common? They're both in my dumpster.

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Where did the girl go when a bomb was dropped on her? Everywhere

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What do the world and jelly beans have in common? Nothing.

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If I were a cat, would you help with the toast?

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Roses are red, violets are blue, so is my face, I'm constipated

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What did the Black guy say to the Jew? Lets be equals

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what do a black guy and a white guy have in common? neither of them are purple

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What's the difference between a black guy and a bench? A black guy is a living, breathing human being, and a bench is an inanimate object

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There was a girl who had a dream of becoming a famous movie star. So, after five years of hard work and dedication, she didn't become a famous movie star. Dreams don't always come true. Refrigerators keep things cold.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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