Simon walks into a bar. He orders his favorite beer. The bartender says "Hey Simon, I see you're back with the usual, aye?" Simon says "Touch you tongue to your elbow." The bartender couldn't do it.

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What is hitlers favorite planet: jewpiter

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why wont our kids have time to socialize? because theyll all be too busy trying to find a solution for global warming.

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What do you call a man who interru- SHUT UP!

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A man is mowing the lawn. The mower stops, so he reaches down to see if something's stuck in the blades. What does he pull out? His finger.

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What do you call a place where all hopes and dreams go to die as this place is contained of depression and the lingering smell of death? www.anti-joke.com

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whoever just posted that stupid yo mama crap answer my comment

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I'm Andrew Schmitt

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How many pancakes do you need to reach a 2.5m roof? Purple, because aliens don't fly

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Why did the Football Coach go to the Bank?? To Cash his Paycheck.

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Why did nobody answer when billy knocked on the door? Billy was a loaf of bread.

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Q: How do u make a butcher cry A: Kill its family

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What did the Christian say to the Muslim. Nothing. He understood his right to have a opinion even if his religion is against it.

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A religion is like a penis. They are both nouns.

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why did the chicken cross the road? no one knows because it got hit by a bus.

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WHY DO IDIOTS RIGHT STUPID JOKES BECAUSE THEY HAVE NOTHING BETTER TO DO WITH THERE LIVES.

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Why do girls not have to have drivers license? Because they don't need a car to get from the bedroom to the kitchen ;) Don't mean to offend anybody! His joke is just funny

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Women. One of the genders a human can be.

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Hey dude. who died.... crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets YO MAMA

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got run over by a semi and died.

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ew. I wouldn't sleep with you if you were the last man on earth! ...that's what she said!

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"Ask me a question." "No" "Cheese" ... "What?"

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Why did the man wipe his bum with a sweat-shirt? Because they were all out of toilet paper

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Why did the Muslim suicide bomber commit suicide? He was nervous and didn't think he could hijack a plane.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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