Q: How did that man get two black eyes? A: He was born!

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Knock, knock. The man knocking finds a note taped to the door saying "we'll be back in a week", the man proceeds to walk back home and tell his wife that they weren't home and that he'll return the rake he borrowed from them next week when they're back.

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Two blondes are sitting in a car. They took a drive and later enjoyed turkey sandwiches at the local eatery.

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What was the Alzheimer patient favorite drink? What was the Alzheimer patient favorite drink?

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Knock knock Who's There Doctor Doctor Who? Wrong, it's Dr. Doozer, you have AIDS

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A blonde goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor, doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains!" "That is a worrying symptom," says the doctor, who immediately recommends the woman for a thorough psychiatric assessment.

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(Q) Why did the little boy cross the road? (A) To get to the police officer. (Q) Why did the little boy need the police officer? (A) because he was raped.

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Why do black people eat watermelon? It is a good source of vitamin C.

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What did the lawyer get for Christmas? More paper work

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What did the little crippled boy get for his birthday? He's an orphan so he doesn't know his birthday.

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Did you hear about the kidnapping yesterday? He slept for at least 3 hours.

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I got 99 problems... and an indeterminate number of them are bitches.

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What happened when a boy threw a ball at the wall? It hit him in the face

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here's a joke a black man goes in a store and buy something

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Knock Knock. who's there? It's me. you need to be specific...

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What's a bit smaller than the tallest man in the world? The 2nd tallest man in the world.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Not Madeline McCann.

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What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint

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Dylan Eichas

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Q: What do you call a pakistani that practices medice? A: Doctor

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What do you get when you mix a dog and a cow blood everywhere

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Yo mama is so fat that it is obvious obesity runs in the family.

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How do you stop a run-away bus? You sit down in the driver's seat and gently place your foot on the brake pedular and proceed to press it down. The brake pads, located in the calipers, will squeeze the brake discs and slow the bus eventually to stop at the crosswalk for the old lady accompanied by a young boy scout to cross the street and continue their wonderful lives.

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A dog walks into a bar, looks at the bartender, lifts its leg and pisses on a bar stool. What does the bartender do ? He chases the dog out the bar and gets a mop to mop up the piss.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops