Do you know what lmnop is? No. A group of five consecutive letters.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick!

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Q-if you are what you eat ,does that make you cannibal? A- yes

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What did the monster under the bed say to another monster? I have the odd feeling that someone is on top of the bed.........

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These two guys walk into a bar. You'd think the second guy would've noticed it was there.

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A man is driving and hits a woman. Who's fault is it? The man's: pedestrians always have the right of way.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Not Michael Jackson!

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What did the commentor say when he saw the "waht's worse than finding a worm in your apple...the holocaust." joke? I am offended to your cruel referance to worms.

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. The bartender looks up and says "what is this, some kind of joke?!"

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Your mom is so hairy... it doesn't even seem like she underwent chemotherapy for her breast cancer a few months ago.

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Q: Where do you go when its cold? A: A corner because its 90 degrees.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Btw I have aids And now you too

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Why did the cat cross the road? he wanted to be a docter.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What does water smell like? water.

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What has hands but cannot feel? A sociopath; due to his or her mental health condition they are incapable of feeling true emotion.

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Gotta go Mark Gotta go Mark MARK MARKMARKMARK! Moving at the speed of mark I'm the quickest mark around Got ourselves a mark Start getting a new mark Without any mark On top of mark! Go- Go- Go- Don't mark Don't mark Just markmarkmarkmark! mark, he's on the run mark, he's number one mark, he's coming next so watch out for mark X! Gotta go mark, gotta go mark mark mark markmarkmark Go go go go go go go go go! marrrrrkkk X!!

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "why the long mane?"

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Want to hear a joke? Women's rights

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roses are red turtles are random. cancer

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What did the teenage girl get for her birthday? Pregnant.

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Why couldnt the man find his wallet? He didnt have one

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Getting up for a black person on a buss

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arena football

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops