What's the same between grapes and squirrels? They're both purple, except for the squirrel.

How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? One, although depending on how high the light in question is and where it's located she may need someone to help hold a ladder for her, if it's particularly unsteady.

Why can't Tom Maynard play cricket anymore Because he's dead

What's the difference between Elisabeth Fritzl and Pope John Paul II? Pope John Paul II wasn't imprisoned and raped continuously over a 24 year period in a horrific act of cruelty by his father

What's the difference between Timmy and a car? Timmy can be brutally murdered.

How do a jew, an African, and u white man stop a train? They pull the breaks

Why did the blond wreak her car? She stayed up a very long time studying for her mid-term exam, And therefore, was not as attentive to the flow of traffic.

What's green and has wheels? A green car.

Man: Why do you wear your wedding ring on the wrong finger? Woman: Oh, wow, thanks for pointing that out. Silly me.

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for his birthday? A bike

Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

So a woman walks into a store... There's a lamp selling for $5.99. She buys it because she thinks that's a pretty good deal.

I'm so full I could stop eating.

Your momma is so dumb, she failed the IQ test.

What would EARTH without ART be? EARTH, you dummy.

Person A said: Knock Knock! Person B could not answer the door as he could not hear Person A's announcement of his or her arrival.

What would Steve Jobs be doing today if he were alive? Dying.

how did the girl die? she read all of your terrible anti-jokes.

Why did they bury the fireman on the east side of the green grassy hill, to the left of the old well, underneath the huge apple tree? Because he was dead.

Why did Susie fall out the swing, Because I hate disabled people and i pushed her

Q. What did Michael Jackson say to the banana? A. Nothing, he's dead.

I am dyslexic

whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and a red corvette? i don't have a red corvette in my garage

What's the difference between 4 and 6? 2.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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