How do you make a kid with ADHD stay still? Shoot him in the knee cap

thumb_up thumb_down -4

why did the bus hit the kid? he dropped his ice cream.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

I was walking down the street next thing I new 15 blacks and Hispanics died in a dive buy. The next day every white guy in the cars doin the drive buy blew up ohwell

thumb_up thumb_down -4

tennis grunts . . . no different from sex noises

thumb_up thumb_down -4

what did the blue paint say to the red paint? i am blue

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why was the kid running around? He was on fire

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Knock Knock Who's there? Me!! .... me who? Just open the motherf***ing door!! MOM!?! Theres a rapist at the door. MOM: No Jimmy, thats your father

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do you do with a dog with no legs? Take it for a drag.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why was the couple in the waiting room crying? Because their son was diagnosed of AIDS and will probably not live into his twenties.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the chicken run across the road? It was 9/11

thumb_up thumb_down -4

An owl and a squirrel were sitting on a tree branch. An acorn fell on the squirrel's head and surprised, the owl moved its head 3.276 degrees to the right. The squirrel apologized for the inconvenience, but the owl would not listen, so flew off to buy a ferry to help children with terminal illnesses get to school.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do you call a Mexican without any arms or legs? A bean.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's worse than getting AIDS? shaking hands with a liberian doctor. Knock Knock Who's there? Ebola

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Have you ever seen a cowboy chasing boot?

thumb_up thumb_down -4

I like peanuts. I like peanuts. I like peanuts. I'm allergic to peanuts. DAMIT

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What did the blind, deaf and mute kid get for Christmas? Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What does a black person call black friday? Friday.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why don't you play cards with a cheetah? It will attack you.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do you call a dog with 5 legs? A dog with 5 legs.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the man get frustrated searching through a box of forks? He was looking for a spoon.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

So 2 black guys walk into a bar and the bartender looks around and say "what will you fine gentlemen have?" and they order and payed their tab and could not have been more courteous, amirite?

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's worse than breaking your arm? Not having any arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

As a stand-up comedian, I've been really interested in how comedians have recovered from jokes not hitting making fun of the fact. Recently, I was in a situation where a rhetorical question didn't hit, and anti-joking (lamenting on the lack of a punchline sarcastically) ended up generating the laugh I needed to move on! Hurray for Anti-jokes! Me: You know the gym Extreme Fitness? Audience: SILENCE Me: (sarcastically) Yes, exactly. That's exactly how that interaction went in my mind when I was practising at home. I ask question - audience responds euphorically - I continue with my joke... http://michaeljagdeo.wordpress.com/2012/01/29/anti-jokes-how-to-recover-when-a-joke-doesnt-hit/

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops