A guy and a girl had sex, it was casual.

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Why does Jonny have a phobia birds? Because he has one glued to his face.

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What's a pirate's favorite letter of the alphabet? Aye, ye be thinkin' it to be "ARRRR" - but it be the C

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What's the difference between a pregnant woman and a lightbulb? The lighbulb isn't also dying of terminal cancer.

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Boom.

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Knock, Knock Who is there? Yo Yo who? *the man ran away and was never seen again, because he had nowhere to stay*

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Why are you asleep? Because I'm tired.

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Duke: Hi Sally: Hello Duke: Nice weather huh? Sally: I couldn't tell ya duke, I'm not a meteorologist.

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Wanna hear a joke? Sure. Too bad I don't have one.

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Two blondes are sitting in a car. They took a drive and later enjoyed turkey sandwiches at the local eatery.

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Whats better than pizza? Pepperoni pizza, if you like pepperoni that is.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't because he lives in a chicken coop and has never even seen a road.

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A horse walks into a bar.. Several people get up and leave as they see the potential danger in the situation..

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So a Jewish man walks into a bar, You think Jesus being all knowing would have realized it was there.

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whats annoying and black? black people

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How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One

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what does the pope have against homosexuals a whip

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A mother and father heard their young son sobbing in his room, so they ran upstairs to see what the problem was. When they got to his room, they found the older son was dead and hanging from the ceiling. And the younger son was actually laughing, not crying.

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What's worse than stepping on a lego? Being eaten alive by a man-sized spider.

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(insert antijoke here

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Knock knock. Who's there? Not Madeline McCann.

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How do you stop a run-away bus? You sit down in the driver's seat and gently place your foot on the brake pedular and proceed to press it down. The brake pads, located in the calipers, will squeeze the brake discs and slow the bus eventually to stop at the crosswalk for the old lady accompanied by a young boy scout to cross the street and continue their wonderful lives.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs on your porch? Matt.

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Why was the gorilla crying? His brother died

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops