Chuck Norris walks into a bar, and asks for directions to the nearest Applebee's.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

I was just thinking of how much i laughed at the challenger launch.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

If you like piña coladas! You might be an alcoholic

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What do you get when you cross a rock and a paper bag? A rock inside of a paper bag.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Anne Widdecombe becomes attractive.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Knock... Knock... Who's there? AIDS.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the boy want to sleep in the same bed as his parents? His bedroom was on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Yo mamas so fat she is obese

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What do animals eat at the beach? Sandwitches

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why was Little Billy crying? He had cancer. Why was Little Sally crying? Little Billy's cancer was contagious.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What do you get when you cross Michael Jackson? A collision, if Michael Jackson were alive.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

why didnt the kid get anything for christmas? santa exploded

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends how you throw 'em.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because it lacked the requisite musculature to facilitate locomotion

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Person 1: Why do Jews have big noses? Person 2: Why? Person 1: No, I was asking you that question. Person 2: ??!!

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What did the black man say to the white man? Hello

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Executioner: Would you like to make a statement? Mr Murderer: Yes, I would love to sing a song. Executioner: Very well. Begin. Mr Murderer: There were 6 billion in the bed, and the little one said roll over, roll over. So they all rolled over and one fell out...

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A man walks into a bar, he now has a mild concussion

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Knock knock. Who's there? The mailman. I don't believe you.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A blue whale walks into a bar. The bartender says "What can I get for you?" The blue whale says "EEEEEEYYYYYYYOOOOHHHHHMMMMMMM"

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What do you call a black priest? HOLY SHIT!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the black guy cross the road? Because he found a crosswalk with a walk symbol near his destination.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

it was a breazy night my pecker was shriveld up like a loose bit of ham. i tucked it in between my legs and dicided to pull my pants down to my ancles and began to run like a sissy. i saw a stumpy little juice ed in the distance it was peter andre he told me that he wanted a slut fucken and said he wanted to pull my banjo right back to the balls and suck it till the moon goes down i cumed all over his glasses then we began to kiss i bent over for him and he stook is fat fucken trout in my dark tight cave there was swet dripping from my cock aka carl mcvittie

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A mosquito flies into a bar and orders a bloody mary, the bartender then takes out a swatter and kills the pest. Noticing the event, the patrons cheer and continued drinking their frothy beverage. Minutes later, the phone rings and the bartender answers the phone. "Hello?" "Hi, I'm looking for a friend of mine, is he there?" "Let me check, by the way, what's his name?" "Jack Hoff" "One sec. HEY FELLAS(yelling over the noisy bar), IS THERE A JACK HOFF HERE? I NEED A JACK HOFF! ANYONE?" Mr. Hoff, sitting at the bar hears this and asks, "who is it?" "He said he's a friend of yours!" "Which one?" " He said his name's Dick Stroker and he needs help on something hardhe'll meet you around back." "Oh ok, thanks."

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops