Yo momma so fat she was baptized in a church, because she wasn't as fat as she is currently.

Wanna hear a joke? Sure. Too bad I don't have one.

Knock, knock. The man knocking finds a note taped to the door saying "we'll be back in a week", the man proceeds to walk back home and tell his wife that they weren't home and that he'll return the rake he borrowed from them next week when they're back.

Why was the man angry? Because I slept with his wife.

what did the girl trapped in the fire say? help

Patient: Doctor, will I be able to play the piano when my arm heals? Doctor: Did I not tell you? You insurance didn't cover the cost of this operation. Your arm is never going to be healed!

Why was the man sad after mowing is lawn? He ran over his dog.

That's a lie, buffaloes are extinct now

How did Hellen Keller's parents punish her? They sent her to her room.

Lacrosse

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it's a chicken and it doesn't know any better. It probably doesn't know where it is much less where it's going.

hey, can you answer a question for me? yeah, sure. ThankYou!

elliot forsythe is a paedo

A man walks into a bar. He has three drinks, then he leaves because he realizes he needs to get home because he has to get up early to go to his job in the morning.

What do you call something that comes out of a llama's butt? poop

Person 1: Your Ugly Person 2: Your mom's ugly

Johnny has 30 pints of ice cream. He eats 25 pints. What does Johnny have? Diabetes. Johnny has diabetes.

A doctor walks into a room after a woman has just given birth to her baby Doctor: I've got some good news and some bad news Mom: Whats the bad news? Doctor: Your Baby is Ginger. Mom: So what's the good news? Doctor: It's dead.

hi.... bonjour... hola... DOOO YOUUUU UNDERSTANDDD MEEE !!!!!!!!!!!

How did the soccer team win? They scored the most goals.

-Is Michael Jackson dead? - HELL YEAH HE'S DEAD!!

a guy who can fly walks up a hill and jumps off a cliff. his flying power fails him and he dies on impact

What do you call a with no arms and no legs floating in the water? About to drown.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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