there was a pre school teacher and he told the children to draw a squirell. One boy breaks into tears because his entire family was slaughtered by a pack of squirrels. This upset the teacher

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Simon says.. Nothing because he's deaf.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? I don't know. He couldn't open it.

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Every day thousands of pets and animals are beaten, neglected and abused.

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What do you call a New Zealander with 1000 lovers? A shepard

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you know somebody is lying when it IS opposite day.

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Why cant African children read? While there are many contributing factors the largest would probably be the lack of a standardized education system mainly due to the logistical factors involved in reaching so many wide spread communities. Also the current economic climate and general disregard for civilians by the governments in these area would suggest that the states' focus would be on other issues besides the welfare of their citizens, this is probably similar to other countries in similar situations such as middle eastern, eastern european, and latin and south america. Then again, not really being educated on this issue in almost any way, has probably contributed to a broad generalization, and so the premise of this joke is most likely flawed in any case.

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? 10. 3 in back, 2 up front and the rest in the ash tray.

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a man walks in to a bar he says "what can i get for a free beer" the bartender says "okay but first you have to make my donkey laugh" so he goes in there and makes it laugh and gets a free beer ant then the next day he goes in and says "what can i get for a free beer" the bartender says "okay but first you have to make my donkey cry" so he goes in there and makes the horse cry and the bartender says " i will give you a free beer but first tell me what you did to make my donkey laugh and cry" the man says " first to make the donkey laugh i told the donkey i had a bigger penis than him then to make him cry i showed him

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What's black, white, and red all over? Half of a dalmatian.

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Why did the black man walk into a bar? To order a drink.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because a man holding a shotgun was chasing him

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Knock, Knock. Come in!

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I obviusly meant: Have you ever seen a cow chasing boots? Because the one with the cowboy chasing boots doesn't make sense...

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I scream You scream The police come It's awkward.

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Why did the witch stay up all night with a broken broomstick? Because she couldn't sweep.

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A Brunette, a Redhead and a Blond all jump off a cliff, which one will hit the ground last? Since the acceleration of gravity is 9.8 m/s they will all hit the ground simultaneously and with enough force to completly shatter their bodys making body recovery extreemly difficult. They must have had a hard life.

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David Cameron

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Q: What do you call an alligator in a vest? A: An investigator

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Many men trespass on my property to taste my milk based beverages. They insist that it's quality is superior to yours. I could teach you how to make such milk based beverages, but I would have to levy a fee.

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What did the caterpillar say when he emerged from his chrysalis? I am a butterfly.

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Q: What do you call men at sea? A: Sailors

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What is green and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

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Why couldn't the little girl color in her coloring book? Her arms were amputated.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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