Why was the chicken afaid to cross the road? because there was no road.

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Why did the cow jump over the moon? To see outer space

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Why was six afraid seven? Well, ever since six took an arrow to the knee he wanted to know who shot it. so he did some investigating, looked up some records and found seven was in the same war as him. then he thought about it, the big 7 scribed on the arrow he got shot with. Right then and there pain went into his back shooting upwards. He smacked the ground, and in his last moments of life saw seven standing above him. If your expecting another end down here then your a stereotype.

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How do you make a boy cry? Kill his family

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What do you call two mexicans playing basketball? Friends

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How long does it take a woman to park a car? Shouldn't take long, depends on the size of the parking spot.

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Q: whats worse that sucking at piano A: the world blowing up

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Why did Dave stop going to the laundromat? Because he was a suicide bomber.

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She was blind.

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My son lost his first tooth today...so proud. Took my punch like a champ

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What happened to the child who was rushed into hospital with a deadly disease? He pulled through. I'ts depressing to be constantly hearing sad anti jokes, so here is a nice one. The child in question lived to eighty one, had a great life and a good job. See, it's nice to read a happy anti joke!

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If she's old enough to count, she's probably in second grade.

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One day, a small bald man was walking up the street, when her saw a large red porche, extremely grand, and the door was wide open. He walked over and inspected the open door, and to his surprise, the keys were in place by the steering wheel. He was a good man, with a loving wife and two teenage children, and he had no intention of steeling the vehicle. But astonished by the owner lack of protection, he hopped into the car and drove it around the block, just for the thrill of riding such an amazing car. Around 30 seconds after, he parked the car, got out, leaving the car in the same place, with the door open and the keys in, then he walked home and lived the rest of his life.

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Q: Why did the duck eat some grass? A: because we are so careless that we caused global causing the entire pond to shrink to a size where it cannot raise a family and the fish could not prosper so the duck could not eat what it had forcing it do consume an inedible substence causing it to die because is not a natural part of a ducks diet

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How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

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What's the most popular fruit in the U.S.? Bananas What's the most popular vegetable in the U.S.? Stephen Hawking

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A doctor walks into a bar, he stumbles backwards as he is taking his coat of, and the barman chuckles.

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What is green and fuzzy and when it falls from a tree, your dead? A pool table.

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One time at band camp, I advanced my clarinet skill, which led me to have a good life.

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Why did the fall off the building? ... because I pushed her

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Why did the boy cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

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Why did Jane's parachute not open? Because a plane hit her on the way down.

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Why are aspirins white? Because the creator of aspirin didn't feel it necessary to color the pills.

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I going to the kitchen to make a #sandwich.....oh wait this isn't twitter

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops