Your dad is so abusive that he hurts you when he losses his temper

Yesterday I was diagnosed with Depression... It made me sad.

You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can't rob a bank! That's a felony. ;)

What did the chicken say to the black guy? Nothing, humans and chickens can not communicate.

"Look me in the eye" said Cyclops.

whats the difference between a door knob? a milk carton, because people have legs so they can walk !!!!!

Johny wanted a pogo stick for his birthday. Johny's mom got him a pogo stick for his birthday. The day of Johny's birthday, he fell off the pogo stick and broke his arm.

How do you turn a fruit into a vegetable? A car crash.

What would you do for a Klondike Bar? I would probably spend somewhere under 3 dollars at a store, but only if somebody else drives me. I really don't want to drive, not in this gas shortage. You know what...forget it, Klondike Bars make my teeth hurt due to my sensitive teeth problem. I know I should get that sensitive teeth tooth paste, but I always forget when at the store.

Why are Jewish men circumcised? Because it is the norm with that particular religious group to circumcise male infants shortly after birth.

Why was the Microsoft fan happy? Because Steve Jobs died.

your mothers so over weight that when she jumps in a pool she displaces a proportionately larger volume of water then someone with less body mass.

what did a ginger say to god? nothing gingers dont have souls and therefore cant go to heaven

shut up kobe!

What's black and has the texture of tar? Molasses

What do you call an iphone in a puddle? Broken

there is a black guy and a mexican in a car whos driving? a cop

Why was the blonde staring at the orange juice container? Because she was proud of her work as Chief Marketing Director of Tropicana.

Why is it funny when dogs talk ? Answer: they don't

-Knock, knock! -Who is it? -Me

A jew a muslim and a catholic walk into a doctors office. The doctor is arrested for raping a child and his office closes. The Jew and Muslim find another doctor andthe Catholic dies because he had aids

why was the woman afraid of her bestfriend he raped her

the best time to wear a striped sweater is all the time

you are getting chased by a lion, a tiger, and a zebra. What do you do???? Get off the Merry-go-round.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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