- Anti Joke

An man walks to a bra

"Have you got any Saturday jobs available?" "Yes"

a mulslim wlaks past a bomb shop on his way to join the international peace club

Q: A plane crashes on the boarder of Mexico and America, where do you bury the survivors. A: You don't because there were none, everyone fucking died!

A man on a plane convened his stupid flyer that instead of who in knock-knock jokes it what were, he thought it would funny. Later it really paid off, as they fly very close over water he says "knock knock" "whose there" " Captain Neverlands" "Captain Neverlands wh-...were" "Captain Neverlands IN WATER YOU DUMMY!!!!"

Not from my wife if that is what you think, but its best people dont know who she is, because you know... A guy that gets many ladies = A playa. A girl that lets his guy do that, well, my wife feels safe about her husband (I am dead honest), but I cant expect people to suddenly go "oh yeah, his wife is totally cool and secure about it all, rather than an insecure idiot that allows him to sleep around like the dog he is) Strictly spoken, I am no dog, women say all men are pigs, but no woman settles for a boy, so that makes me a pig.

One day in Africa there was a family of Americans touring an African village. They were a happily married couple with a four year old son. This day however was a very sad day because a group of elephants came trampling through the village. The couple left there kids inside and went to help control the elephants. however the elephants killed them all with their feet. Now the little boy wandered outside because after all he was just a little boy. He was about to be killed when a baby elephant calmed down his mom, so he saved his life. The baby elephant then took the little boy back to the airport by which the married couple came because elephants are very smart. The boy didnt want to leave his new found friend the baby elephant but the little boy was then sent back and lived with his Uncle. When he was older, he had a child of his own, a little boy. One day he decided to take his son to a circus, that was from Africa. He didnt realize there would be elephants there. This day the elephants got spooked by a mice and started to stomp all around. Then the man realized his son was missing. He looked down to find his son about to be stomped on by this old elephant. Just as the elephant was about to stomp he and the man made eye contact. The man thought noticed the look in that elephants eyes, like he reconized them. He thought mabye, just mabye it was the same elephant he was saved by. Turns out it wasn't and the elephant killed his son.

What's worse than the Holocaust? A second Holocaust. What's worse than a second Holocaust? Being raped by Santa Claus. What's worse than that? NOTHING.

Guess what What

Why was the black man tired? It was 3 AM, and he just came back from his demanding job as a surgeon.

Yo mamas so fat that when a bus hit her she said " who threw that pebble at me"

Nick Cannon

What makes boys so stupid? They like to play with girls' hearts and break them until they spew out blood all over the place.

Why was the number 6 afraid of 7? It wasn't.

Bare with me here, im gonna change this up a bit What's better then finding a worm in your apple

What did the ethiopian give his wife for her birthday? HIV

What did the man say when he realized that he was late for work? "Shit, I'm late for work."

penis?

Knock knock. Who's there? Ted. Come in.

One time, I ate 3 chipotle burritos....after a tennis match

Multi Orgasmic Pillow screechers

How do you get a cat out of a tree? You throw a rock at it

Q: why did the 10 year old squirt his dad with the water hose? A: what 10 year old WOULDN'T?

A blonde walks into a bar. Shes now in a coma.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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