A blonde walked into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

every 60 seconds in Africa, a minute goes by.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What did one cat say to the other cat? --------- Meow --------- What's pink and fluffy? --------- Pink fluff --------- What's green and yellow? --------- Grass. I lied about the yellow part.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A white guy, a black guy, and an asian guy are all sitting on a park bench. They share several minutes of uncomfortable silence due to cultural differences.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

If you like piña coladas! You might be an alcoholic

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Johny got a iphone ipad and a macbook. He bragged to his friend. His friend said, i got an apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

KNOCK KNOCK who's there? OUCH! what's your door knob made of? nails?

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Two men were walking down the street. All of a sudden, the first man turns to the second and pulls out his hands of 4 fingers each. The second man shows his hand of 6 fingers each. What does this show about them? Together they have 20 fingers total.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Q: What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? A: A pilot, you racist.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

what do you call a drunk person? By his or her name and call him a cab

thumb_up thumb_down +14

what do u say when u meet somebody new hello

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What did the man say when he saw a tornado coming his way? "Oh my god, that's a tornado. I better get out of its way so I don't get injured.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

wanna hear a joke? woman's rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How do you know it's a bad day? When your brain does not release a high enough level of seratonin.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What's Green and flies? Super Grapes cousin Super Grape

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb? None, for the task at hand is so simple, you should do it.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Neither has he.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Whats a dogs favorite thing to eat? Food.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, nor does the chicken because it's a chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What do homeless people get at Christmas? Cold.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What are the two sexiest farm animals? Consider that we are humans we shouldn't find any sex appeal in animals but if i had to guess I would say Brown Chicka Brown Cow

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Terry was always struggling with mathematics. On his last report card he received a D- in math. His parents were naturally very upset with him because they knew their son could do much better and so did Terry. Terry wanted to make his parents proud so he buckled down and started studying on a regular basis. Terry realized his had work had payed off when his 3rd grade teacher handed him his report card. Terry had revived an A in math! On his walk home from school all he could think about was how proud his mom and dad were going to be. On that walk home Terry was savagely torn apart by an escaped lion from the local zoo. His head was never found.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why cant African children read? While there are many contributing factors the largest would probably be the lack of a standardized education system mainly due to the logistical factors involved in reaching so many wide spread communities. Also the current economic climate and general disregard for civilians by the governments in these area would suggest that the states' focus would be on other issues besides the welfare of their citizens, this is probably similar to other countries in similar situations such as middle eastern, eastern european, and latin and south america. Then again, not really being educated on this issue in almost any way, has probably contributed to a broad generalization, and so the premise of this joke is most likely flawed in any case.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A boy with cancer decides to go skydiving for his 18th bithday. Unfortunately, his parchute doesn't work & he dies before he hits the ground.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops