Why did the sailor fall off the boat? Because vampires arent real.

Snow White found a magic lamp in the middle of the forest. She rubbed it and became pregnant because the spout was a penis.

What's worse than a pimple? Finding out it's a botfly.

why are jews so cash hungry? because like the rest of us they are looking for a way to survive and feed their family.

Hickory Dickory Dock. 2 mice ran up the clock. The clock struck one.. and the second one got away with major injuries, dying in a hospital three days later. The clock is now serving its 8th year in jail out of 25 years, and does not regret anything.

What did the Muslim receive for Christmas? Nothing. Muslims don't celebrate Christmas.

Knock, knock. Who's there? Me. Me Who? Me. Uh.

What do you call it when an Arabic man gets shot? Murder.

wanna hear a joke? woman's rights.

Why was the mime crying? Her husband died.

why wasnt the baby cute? -because it was dead

How many Black People does it take to change a lightbulb? One. Changing a lightbulb is a very simple task.

1 out of every 3 relationships someone is cheating, I wonder if it was my wife or my girlfriend

Have you ever seen Helen Keller's house? No. Neither did she.

Why did the dog in Detroit die in the street? It was stabbed.

Life is like a box of chocolates! It sucks if you have diabetes

Why Was Mary Short? She Had No Legs.

What did Batman say to Robin just before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile

Why couldn't the prostitute give a proper blow job..... She had no lips

Johnny had 50 candy bars. He ate 45 of them. What does Johnny have now? Diabetes. Johnny has diabetes.

what happens when an unstoppable force hits an unmovable object? it goes around.

A man walked into a bar. He was meeting his friends but was 30 minutes early so he went down the road to buy some food. He had recently began dieting after watching a series of lifestyle programs which informed him of the potential risks involved with high cholesterol and blood pressure levels. He purchased a garden salad and a freshly squeezed orange juice, and made it back to the bar in time to meet his friends.

What did the chocolate milk say? Yoo-hoo.

A man on an airplane is extremely frustrated by a small, screaming child. He puts on his headphones and listens to music.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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