have safe sex

What's the difference between a cat and a banana? One is a cat, the other is a banana.

Knock knock. Who's there? John. John who? I don't have a last name.

I have two friends, Jeffrey and Barbara. You might think that Jeffrey likes sports and beer, and that Barbara likes knitting and cooking. But you'd be wrong, Barbara is dead.

What do you call a dog riding a bicycle? An talented dog.

What kind of a prediction is THAT?

What do get when you mix cancer and a bike? Lance Armstrong

why didn't the chicken cross the road ? because half way acroos he got hit by a car and the animal heath care had to take him away and put him down

What's the difference between 4 and 6? 2.

John: I just ran over a cat... Just kidding! It was your mum.

Three Kids dressed as a bear, a chicken, and a penguin walk into a bar. The bartender asks the to leave as they are all under the legal drinking age.

Vagina jokes aren't funny. Period. Damnit, ignore that.

What did the runner say after he ran 10 miles? I just ran 10 miles.

what's worse than being chased by a turtle? being chased by an angry turtle

Why did Julia fall of the swings? She had no arms. Knock knock? Who's there? Not Julia.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a bomb that explodes in 3 seconds inside your apple.

Want to know whats funnier than 24? 25

whats brown and smells like poop? poop.

You know what pansies remind me of? What? A flower

roses are red violets are blue I have a knife stand by the door

What did the ghost say to the black man? nothing. He just shot him.

How do you know what time it is in the dark? Turn on the light and look at the clock.

Q.What do you call a friend with benefits? A. a buck fuddy.

why did the boy fall off his bicycle? because his dad threw a refrigerator at him.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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