Q. What's the difference between dead babies and celebrities? A. Nobody likes celebrities.

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Hey man how was your trip? great!!! It blew my mind

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What do you call a retarded man? Mentally challenged.

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In Soviet Russia, there are communists.

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Why did the postal worker go to work? Because he has to support his family so they do not starve like his dog.

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Why did the black man fall off the bicycle? He was shot at close range by one of a gang of young white males. This horrific violence was most likely fueled by racial prejudice. Our thoughts go out to the young man's family and friends.

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Q: What did the pope say to the prostitute he passed in the street? A: Bath & Bodyworks are having a sale

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An Asian, Burnett, and a Blond are stranded on an island. They all say, "What the crap?! How'd I get on this island?!"

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how do you kill a bear. -you shoot it.

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A black, a muslim, and a communist walk into a bar, the bartender says "what will it be Mr. President?

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Q: What did the first kid say to the second kid before he handed him a pencil? A: May I have a pencil?

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What did the chicken say to the rhino? Nothing. Animals can't talk.

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why did Sarah fall off the swing? because she had no arms. Knock knock! who's there? not Sarah.

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What do you call something you should prepare yourself for when having sex with a prostitute? A.I.D.S

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Duke: Hi Sally: Hello Duke: Nice weather huh? Sally: I couldn't tell ya duke, I'm not a meteorologist.

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Why did the cookie go to the hospital? Leukemia

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What's the difference between a cat and a dog? Vast. While they are both mammals belonging to the order Carnivora, and therefore have a loose evolutionary connection, dogs belong to the Carnidae family and cats belong to the Felidae family. There would need to be much biological research done to discover all of the differences that result from this.

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What did Jesus say when he was nailed to the cross? AHHHH WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS!?!?!? MY HAND!!! MY HAND!!! AHHHHHHH!!!!! JUST KILL ME!!! PLEASE WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS?!?! MY OTHER HAND AHHHH!!! HAHAAAAAAAAAaaaa..... AHHHHHHH WHY?!?! MY LEG!!!! MY FOOT NO!!!!! PLEASE!!!!! Ah AH AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAA HAHAHAaaa WHYYYYYYYYY!?

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A chicken crossed the road and the farmer said, "Where the hell is that chicken going!?"

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Which came first the egg or the chicken? The chicken because eggs can't cross the road

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what did batman tell robin before they got into the batmobile? -let's get in the batmobile!

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face." the horse says "my wife has terminal cancer."

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Guy 1: "Hey, you have some updawg on your face." Guy 2: "Oh, thanks. Did I get it?" Guy 1: "Yeah, I think so."

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "why the long face?". The horse doesn't reply because horse can't talk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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