What is the difference between your mother and a hooker? Gonorrhea and her father's approval.

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What did the boy who succsesfully came out of liposection get? Diobeeties.

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What's red, blue, green, yellow, pink, purple, orange, teal, light green, brown, black and white? Colours, except for black and white, for they are the absence and amalgam of all colours, respectively.

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speacking of cheese... steve jobs died

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What did Justin Bieber get for Christmas? An iPod Touch and a few nice sweaters.

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why does crazy george spin a ball on his fingers well? because he has a huge dingo

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???????????? WTF?

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Why did Benjamin Franklin go to the movies? Dim message, sapi message=InputBox("Find Out","Why did Benjamin Franklin Go To the Movies?") Set sapi=CreateObject("sapi.spvoice") sapi.Speak message

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Why shouldnt you throw rocks at a black kid on a bike? Because the kid wasn't riding in your way, you could get arrested for assault and battery, and he probably lives in a low income area and cant afford health insurance if he was injured.

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the world flooded and everybody died how did they die? the all fell into lava!

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A horse walks into a bar.. Several people get up and leave as they see the potential danger in the situation..

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There are two muffins in the oven. One muffin says to the other "phew it's kinda hot in here" the other muffin says "AWW a talking muffin!"

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How much stuff would a stuff muff huff if a stuff muff could huff stuff? Whole dang lotsa

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hi hi strager danger

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What's worse then biting into an apple and finding a worm in it? The spelling errors on anti-jokes.com

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Emo Girl: Whats Your Favorite song? Regulor Girl: Something Carrie Underwood sing!(: Emo Girl: Are you retarted? Regulor Girl: Well im not the one who loves Emos .-. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Honstley, I didnt right this my cousin told me to wriget this... i think its stupied... And Yes, Ima Emo but im not trying to judge people if there emo or not! :D Luv ya! -Angel- <3

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What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

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vn[oiaehsobv[khpogjglprljffknfsiphgeknkldfekageriyreojgyperogerpojregkeporg? cuase u stupid and this stupid joke is to

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Bobby got a new bike there are black kids in bobby's neighborhood bobby doesnt have a new bike anymore

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What did the Mexican firefighter name his twin boys? Thomas and David after his father and grandfather.

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Q: What did the pope say to the prostitute he passed in the street? A: Bath & Bodyworks are having a sale

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When life gets you down, make a comforter.

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why did Sarah fall off the swing? because she had no arms. Knock knock! who's there? not Sarah.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?? Because it Died

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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