Q: A blonde, a red-head, and a brunette all jump off the bridge at the same time. Who hits the ground first? A: As stated by Sir Isaac Newton's third law of gravitation, all three fall to their deaths at the exact same time because the velocity of a falling object is unaffected by the mass of that object... or their hair colour. Idiot.

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How old is your mom Dead

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Why did the ginger cross the road? To tell the police that her family had been taken hostage.

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a girl had just gotten dumped by her boyfriend over a text message. she got very sad and became suicidal

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what do a black guy and a white guy have in common? neither of them are purple

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What is worse than stubbing your toe. Being shot

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What's worse than getting a fly stuck up your nose? Been alone in a hospital room with Jimmy Saville.

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"Knock knock." "No."

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How do you get a baby to stop crying? Hit it with a brick.

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Why cant t-rexes clap their hands? They no longer exist

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What do you call a paralyzed man on a fishing boat? Robert

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A man walks into a bar with a chicken on his head the bartender asks the man why do you have a chicken on your head the man replies the chicken is thirsty

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Q: What did the teacher say at the end of recess. A: "Recess is over."

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What colour is a black man in a freezer black

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Why did Bob fall off the swing? Because he had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there Obviously not Bob, Idiot What did Bob get for christmas? A glove Actually, I lie. He hasn't unboxed it yet.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he has an abusive farmer and needs to get away before it gets any worse.

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A black guy walks into a bar. Suddenly, the bar goes quite, the music turns off and everybody stares. It was a gay bar and the man was very good looking.

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Why do gingers get mad when people call them gingers? Because it hurts their feelings

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What's short, green, and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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If a banana is a vegetable, how come your mother gets confused when I stick pretzels in my butthole?

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What do you call a person with disabilities? Names.

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How did you know it was bedtime at Michael Jackson's house? When his clock's big hand met the little hand, usually at 10 or 11, though sometimes later if he had a concert that night.

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Whats black and white and eats like horse? A zebra.

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How do you make a person cross the road? Ask them nicely.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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