your mothers so fat...... shes borderline diabetic.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was a green man.

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Excuse me, I have a shitload of stuff to do, so you are Eliza huh? I thought that was just one person conveying something to someone. Anyway, what is your name? My name is actually Nero, but you do not strike me as an Eliza, first name is more than enough. You know, if you dare, Ill be back shortly, I was gonna shower but then again, I haven't moved at all today, so yeah. Saved you? I have never saved anyone well, excuse me then, see you around, worry less about people bothering with us chatting, hell they might risk learning something (not a chance, people here are fucking jackasses, with one exception, and I do not mean me this time).

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You know what's cool? Yep.

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It was Valentines Day today, I thought I should get her something... I brought flowers to her grave.

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A priest, a pedophile, and a child rapist walks into a bar. He orders a beer.

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Did you hear about the man with 3 balls? He liked tennis

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your mom is so black that it can be assumed she is of african descent

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How do you stop a black man from drowning Get your foot off of his head

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting shot in the knee several times and bleeding to a slow and painful death.

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An asian man, a black man, and a white man walk into a bar. All three of them order a scotch, coincidentally this is their favorite beverage.

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Q: How many ghetto people does it take to carry a fat gorilla? A: 14

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how do you scare a deaf person? you yawn

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What did Canada say to America? We will not become apart of the United States where people are known as Fat Nascar lovin hicks!

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Yo mama is so stupid that her IQ is relatively lower than the average.

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A doctor walks into a bar. It's his day off and decides to celebrate after a long week of working.

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How do you make a plumber sad? You kill his family.

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How Many R's are in Terrence? two, how could there be 6?

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Why did the baby boy start crying? He got hit with a toaster

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Yo' momma's so black, I hope she didn't experience any racism growing up in school.

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-Whats not funny and has wheels? >What? -The Holocaust... I was lying about the wheels

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What's the hardest thing about eating a quadriplegic? The wheelchair.

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Why did the teacher get mad at the student? Because he ran over him with a car.

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Life gives you lemons you make lemonade. What do you do when life gives you melons... youre skrewed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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