In Soviet Russia, there are communists.

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Why did the postal worker go to work? Because he has to support his family so they do not starve like his dog.

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Why did the U.S.A. vote in a black president? Because racial prejudice is a thing of the past and the U.S.A. is a liberal and progressive nation.

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An Asian, Burnett, and a Blond are stranded on an island. They all say, "What the crap?! How'd I get on this island?!"

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Q: What did the pope say to the prostitute he passed in the street? A: Bath & Bodyworks are having a sale

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Why couldn't the Hispanic guy become a firefighter? Because the fire chief was racist.

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A black, a muslim, and a communist walk into a bar, the bartender says "what will it be Mr. President?

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Q: What did the first kid say to the second kid before he handed him a pencil? A: May I have a pencil?

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John had 32 candy bars. He ate 28 of them. What does John have now? daibetes, john has diabetes.

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What do you get when you mix a dog and a cow blood everywhere

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A dog walks into a bar, looks at the bartender, lifts its leg and pisses on a bar stool. What does the bartender do ? He chases the dog out the bar and gets a mop to mop up the piss.

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What did the chicken say to the rhino? Nothing. Animals can't talk.

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What did the tractor say to the cow? I'm a tractor, you're a cow, go figure.

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Whut r bacer dew? Eh muphin

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What do you call something you should prepare yourself for when having sex with a prostitute? A.I.D.S

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the world flooded and everybody died how did they die? the all fell into lava!

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how do you wake lady gaga up? you hit her in the face with a frying pan

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Why did the cookie go to the hospital? Leukemia

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What's black and white and red all over. An interracial suicide pact.

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What's the difference between a cat and a dog? Vast. While they are both mammals belonging to the order Carnivora, and therefore have a loose evolutionary connection, dogs belong to the Carnidae family and cats belong to the Felidae family. There would need to be much biological research done to discover all of the differences that result from this.

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What did Jesus say when he was nailed to the cross? AHHHH WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS!?!?!? MY HAND!!! MY HAND!!! AHHHHHHH!!!!! JUST KILL ME!!! PLEASE WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS?!?! MY OTHER HAND AHHHH!!! HAHAAAAAAAAAaaaa..... AHHHHHHH WHY?!?! MY LEG!!!! MY FOOT NO!!!!! PLEASE!!!!! Ah AH AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAA HAHAHAaaa WHYYYYYYYYY!?

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I've got a boner

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Eating chicken off a baby's ass

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Which came first the egg or the chicken? The chicken because eggs can't cross the road

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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